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| "where are we going?" by pierrot le fou |
| 11.16.04 (12:50 pm) [edit] |
"where are we going?" by pierrot le fou [ edit | delete ]
posted Monday, Nov 01, 2004 21:41 (edited Tuesday, Nov 02, 2004 06:58)
[emergency dispatch to martyrs for a nauseated tomorrow]
"tomorrow will never mean anything but a depository for dead hopes and dreams and the future will bring us nothing unless we start to live today"---blacken the skies
Let us be finished with debates about when and where industrial collapse will take place. why should we settle for marx` idea of suffering for Revolution now, only for the promise of freedom later? collapse will not return us to a "golden age" of humanity, and it is unimportant for it to. we do not need a past to justify a future, so it should be of little concern to us---we are different now anyway. we are still young as a species and it is not failure to admit a mistake, the failure is to ignore that a mistake ever took place.
Let us be done with putting aside our passions for a Heaven (whatever that means) in a Post-Collapsist world. like the brethren of the free spirit, let us strive to be gods on earth---masters without slaves. if our desires are pushed back for another day, when we are free, what will that Revolution look like? how can we fight TO live if we are not LIVING?
Living is contagious and for those who have forgotten how, it is imperative that i live my life to the fullest; for me to be complete, but also to display the possibilities of living to others. unless we can show people a better alternative to the current realiTV we have no business critiquing the current order, or advocating its abolishment.
So when people ask me about my lifestyle, i tell them:
being a revolutionary is simply a better way to live.
their laws guarantee us the right to remain silent, the right to a public trial by a jury of our peers (though MY peers would not put me on trial---would yours?)---what about the right to live life like we will not get another chance, to have reasons to stay up all night in urgent conversation, to look back on every day without regret or bitterness? such rights we can only claim for ourselves---and should these not be our central concerns, not the minutae of protocol and survival? for those of us born into capitivity gilded by the blood and sweat of less fortunate captives, the challenge of leading a life worth living of stories worth telling is a lifelong project, and a formidable one; but all it takes, at any moment, to meet this challenge is to contest that captivity.
More importantly, this reality is not monolithic. there are other ways to live; and it is important to remember that my freedom creates your freedom and vise versa. my rights though do not end where yours begin; regardless, we still look to what is in our best interests---learning to recognize the connections in this world. people maintaining the status quo strive to hide it, but OUR consumptive lifestyles and our passivity to the decisions enforced by those in power are the cause of absolute misery throughout the majority of the world. it is not in our best interests to keep our boots on the throats of others , we have seen the results and they come back to bite us on the ass---a little taste of foreign policy at home.
To open up this reality beyond its narrow confines could bring upon a reconnection to the earth, thus a disappearance of alienation (and alien-nations all together) and a more natural way of living. it is this opportunity, not the goal, that could open up the floodgates to freedom worldwide. so, a viable way to get from here to there---a healthy dose of individualism. life is here for your benefit, your fun, your ego, the world is here to benefit you---otherwise, why be alive?
However birds do not shit in their nests; so why do we? it amazes me that we, in our best self-centered utilitarian mood, could hurt ourselves. are we really so myopic that we could believe taking care of our wants, our desires, and our ego allows us to engage in practices that are destroying the planet. if we think taking care of number one means fucking over our fellow humans to "make it to the top," fucking over our planet to have a fast car and a houseful of technological wizardry, and fucking over other species by stuffing them callously into our mouths, then we are no self-centered egoists. we are just idiots. we are not lone, autonomous actors completely independant from the natural world and other human beings.
Now by definition, any revolt or insurrection which results in a major reduction of state powers or decentralization is collapse. but we need a glorification of Collapse like we need one of Revolution or Disaster---none of which is a definitive end or fix. what we need are revolutionS, daily, to confront and betray the past and future, to never betray the present. that will be more likely to lead us towards a collapse or disaster, which truly offers us only options, a chance of broadening our reality beyond the limited scope of the current panoptikon. it gives us an opportunity to create change instead of just continuing to build up this existench---ad nauseum.
The essential quality of collapse or disaster as we know them today, is the break with the status quo; it is the one feature they all share. it is not destructiveness that sets disasters apart: the slaughterhouses, suicides, and collateral damages of Business As Usual take more lives than all the worst catastrophes combined, while many disasters do not result in any deaths at all, such as black outs and bomb threats. if the casualties of all disasters were tallied and compared to those of "normal life," disaster would look very safe indeed, just as the number of deaths and injustices that have resulted from people obeying authorities far outnumber those perpetrated by those who have broken laws.
So collapse brought on by revolutionS does not necessarily mean more suffering. this system already causes huge amounts of suffering (mostly psychological in the West), so it could be that revolutionaries may be lessening the extent of the disaster; by bringing down this death machine soon rather than later. the possibility of pain and death must also be balanced against the loss of freedom and dignity; and besides, the bigger the system grows the more disasterous its downfall will be.
Collapse is imminent, let there be no mistake about that. a system cannot sustain itself when it takes more then it puts back or is based on coercion and exploitation, but, it does not make or break my freedom. it is in fact the other way around, my freedom, my desire to go feral, will bring upon collapse. it is incidentally also in my best interests to attempt to broaden our perspective by encouraging collapse, simply because it offers us more of a chance for change. we already live in the Disaster area, how about we try a disaster on our own terms, and see where it takes us.
This world of slaves and masters is going up in flames, soon. the conflagration is coming---like a wall of flames coming from the sky, from the hills, from underground, from all sides. we have seen the master`s ever changing faces, and we have seen slavery`s new shapes and new names, but this time, it is all going to burn...and from the ashes a new world will be born. you are invited to join in bringing on the fire. it has already begun, it started when we lit the fuse in our hearts and made the decision that we were not going back.
The spectacle is over---it has been for a long time, yet we remain fixated to the screen. let us not glorify a past unknown to us nor strive towards a future based on fate, five year plans or manifestoes; but strive to live in the present where we take today what tomorrow never brings. we can go just about anywhere, we may be disoriented but we are ALIVE.
Breathe now or breathe never.
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| unwrapped candy on hollow's eve |
| 11.16.04 (12:49 pm) [edit] |
halloween... one of the few holidays i still celebrate!
i love everything about this time of year, especially dressing up like an idiot and walking the streets.
for the other 364 days of the year, people always give me strange looks.
a few hallowe'ens ago, instead of going trick or treating or out to a party, i sat on my porch the whole night dressed as a "stuffed" scarecrow. i had leaves and balled up newspaper coming out of my sleeves, and a hockey mask on like jason. i sat as still as possible on a lawn chair and scared children when they came up to ring the doorbell. some kids laughed, some cried. it was funny. some of the older kids were too smart for me and said "hey, that's a real guy in the chair!" as they got halfway up our driveway, and lots of the parents could tell also. one kid kicked me in the shins to "see if i was real." towards the end of the night though, it got pretty cold so pretty much anyone could tell it was me by my shivering.
on an even more recent halloween, the people i worked with at the time suggested that we all dress up as characters from the wizard of oz. at first i was like "lame" but after much thought, i realized i could go as one of the Wicked Witch's FLYING MONKEYS! i bent coathangers in the shape of wings and attached it to black styrofoam, then made an organ grinder costume out of an old cardigan and made that hat with the tassle. what's it called, a fezze? it was such a kickass outfit. imagine my shock, dissapointment and shame when i arrived to work on october 31st and NO ONE ELSE was dressed like someone from the wizard of FUCKING oz! assholes. what's worse is how all my co-workers CLAIMED they didn't plan anything to make me look stupid. in other words, i did a fine job of that all by my stupid self!
at least the costume wasn't a total loss, cuz that night me and my girlfriend decided to show off our costumes at a biker bar called "Rosco's Roadhouse" (situated in the heart of the ghetto of Brampton). my girlfriend went as Mr. Rogers. she put baby powder in her hair, wore a suit and carried a bag of candy (for the kids). when we walked into the room full of bikers, the woman behind the bar looked at us, the flying monkey and effeminate fred rogers, and she froze.
"could i have a tom collins please?" i said.
she relaxed and said "oh thank god. i thought you guys were here to rob the place!"
"no," i said. "it's halloween! ya know, trick or treat?"
"it is?" she said.
silly bikers. never knowin what day it is.
i went as "Costume Man" once. afro wig, bandana and sunglasses. a freddy glove on one hand and a king-of-cartoons glove on the other hand, and a t-shirt that said "Costume Man." i got a lot of "i don't get it"'s that night which was awesome, though i don't think it ever beat my little brother's costume, i think it was two or three years ago he did it... he went as a black guy. as if the dreadlocks under the rasta hat and black makeup weren't enough, he had a blunt in his mouth and a hooded sweatshirt that said "Basketball" with a ball going through a hoop hahahaha ahhh good times
i went to one halloween party as a mormon. i had the white shirt and black tie, with a backpack on my back and the book in my hand. everyone thought it was funny, though technically i should have got another person to dress up with me (cuz mormons on a mission are always in pairs). the funniest part of this costume was when i walked home from the person's house the next day. EVERYONE on the sidewalk got the fuckhell out of my way! i'm not kidding, they cleared a fuckin path! it was like "oh shit, it's a mormon! don't make eye contact, he'll try to talk to you!"
last halloween, i went as george dubbaya bush. i used the monkey mask from the wizard of oz costume, and did the baby powder trick to make my hair grey. i wore a stupid grey suit like bush always does and put an upside down american flag on the pocket, which was black and white cuz i had to print it out on my poor-ass monochrome printer. i went to my friend's party and when people asked why the US flag was black and white i replied:
"because Bush only SEES things in black and white!" then this smartass goes "ahhh i see, it's not just because you have a monochrome printer?"
"no," i replied.
i admit my costume sucked, i just couldn't think of anything else last year. costume block. then when i got to the party i was so completely upstaged by a girl who came as WILSON, tom hanks' volleyball friend in that movie "Castaway," damn what a good costume. i gave her mad props and confessed my jealousy.
as much as i would love to steal MC A's devilled egg costume from the "Ch-Check It Out" video, stealing costumes is not cool. here are some suggestions for those at a loss for a costume:
put a dunce cap on your head and say you're Mel Gibson!
don a red cape and blue tights, carry a big ring of keys and a plunger and call yourself "The Superintendent!"
get a dog mask, trenchcoat, a ghettoblaster and the book "Big City Lights," and go as the dog from the Daft Punk video
wear a red hooded shirt and cape, carry a picnic basket, and splatter yourself with fake blood... Little Dead Riding Hood!
Chia Pet: Wrap yourself in double-sided tape, then roll around on the lawn.
wrap yourself in aluminum foil and go as a baked potato. this is really cute on little kids.
put on a white sheet with eyeholes cut out. when people ask if you are ghost, be like "what? no... i'm a hankerchief!"
dress in all black, cut lines out of yellow paper and glue them to your shirt. attach a stuffed animal to you and now you are roadkill!
wear a shoe on your head and dress in all pink. you're gum!
Drape yourself in red and pasta-colored yarn. then attach yarn meatballs! all your friends will be jealous and fat people will try to eat you!
dead christopher reeve: steal a wheel-chair from a hospital (sit in one, look sick and have a friend wheel you out). get a cape, and maybe some makeup for that decomposed look.
or you could always just dress in normal clothes and say "i'm a child molester." and when people ask "how is that a child molester costume?" you just say "no, no... I'M A CHILD MOLESTER."
the possibilities are endless ya know...
as my friends may have guessed, i just can't resist going as a celebrity. my Richard Gere costume, complete with Buddha statue and plastic tubing coming out of my ass (stuffed gerbil attached) will hopefully be the hit of the party. it's times like this i wish i had a working camera.
but for now, i leave you with some scary pictures of ghastly ghouls and creatures from the depths of regions most foul...
Happy Halloween all up in this muthafucka!!!
 
 
 
 
 
  
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
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| constructive criticism part 2 |
| 11.16.04 (12:48 pm) [edit] |
here`s some more hate mail from someone who thinks i should be more vigilant in my nazi-hating:
"In one of your entries you printed your friend`s essay called `The Future is Unwritten,` that was published in Green Anarchy magazine. Afterwhich, you proceed to bash Neo-Nazis rallying in Toronto. Green Anarchy issue 39 (page 13) also runs the 20 April 1995 letter from the Unabomber to the New York Times. This fascist creep claims in thesis 161 of a manifesto that has been widely distributed, that nazis and militiamen are `rebels against the system`. To the uninitiated, the Unabomber letter looks utterly bizarre sitting in the same magazine as the anti-fascist report on page 5 of GA 39, Green Apocalypse explains how GA`s bizarre mix of fascism and anti-fascism is rooted in Bakuninism. Like the remnants of the National Front, GA seem to think that by attacking nazi groups such as the BNP, they can prove they are not reactionaries themselves. This is absurd, Green Anarchism is fascist and it should be treated as such."
ok, so the folks at Green Anarchy are fascists because they print a letter from a fascist? and i’m a fascist cuz i print an essay that was published in a fascist magazine? fascist by association, huh? FUCK YOU.
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| urban outfitters made a funny |
| 11.16.04 (12:46 pm) [edit] |
Urban Outfitters` new t-shirt campaign has stirred up controversy in what is shaping up to be a heated election year. while some critics say the t-shirt is "the wrong statement at the wrong time," Urban Outfitters claims the shirt speaks the truth about young people being jaded by (and left out of) the political process. what do you think? does all of the politicians` talk of Social Security and prescription drug benefits for the elderly turn young folks off from voting?
if you were actually ALLOWED to vote for these MIDDLE-AGED ALL MALE CANDIDATES, would you?
what the fuck is going on in this world, where people are for some reason pretending that EITHER of these two MORONS are at all qualified to lead a country to... where are they gonna lead everyone again?
Puff Daddy, Drew Barrymore and Snoop Dogg asking us to vote?
will someone please set themselves on fire in front of the fuckin white house already!!!
Puff Daddy is a fucking moron who once spent 15 minutes on national TV praising the convenience and functionality of his 2-way pager.
Drew Barrymore says it`s important to be a role model for children which is why she takes on such important female roles like "computer graphically altered slut #3" in Charlie`s Angels.
and Snoop Dogg??? didn`t johnny cochrane get yer dumb black ass out of a murder charge? are any of these candidates trying to legalize weed? no? then STAY OUT OF THIS ONE, D to the double oh FAG.
you non-direct-action people choosing sides in the safe, secure coziness of legality are FUCKING. RIDICULOUS.
rock the vote? punkvoter.com? vote or die?!
SHUT THE FUCK UP
speaking of stupid fucking retards... Mr. Jourgensen, author of punkvoter.com said it`s "too bad" that Urban Outfitters "now sells voter suppression t-shirts in a cynical way to market an anti-voting campaign as trendy."
yah? well it`s too bad you use the word PUNK on a website that encourages... uhh... VOTING! quite possibly the most UN-punk thing to ever be invented.
"your t-shirt design is knowingly irresponsible," writes the author of punkvoter.com in his totally irrelevant letter to Urban Outfitters. "It is a disgusting effort to reap profit from cynicism while suppressing civic involvement, and encouraging apathy, not to mention referring to our senior citizens as `old people`."
ohhh no! poor old people... wait on second thought, FUCK OLD PEOPLE!
Mr. Douchebag (Jourgensen, i`m sure all you real punk enthusiasts out there know him as the ex-anarchist from the band whose name is too gay to even mention) also had this to say:
"Punkvoter is a grassroots coalition of punk bands, punk labels and most importantly, punk fans coming together to form a united front in opposition to the dangerous, deadly, and destructive policies of George Bush Jr."
punkvoter... what a stupid fuckin moron you are.
you really think you`re making a difference don`t you? why don`t you and christina aguilera go record an album for the kids in Iraq to listen to while they starve to death?
Jourgensen`s letter to Urban Outfitters begins thusly:
"How can you possibly rationalize that selling a t-Shirt stating: `Voting is for Old People` is not a political agenda? As an artist, I appreciate expressions of outrage. I understand rebellion, and respect the use of irony and sarcasm to prove a point in public speech. But as a board member of Punkvoter.com, I find your T-shirt `Voting is for Old People` to be an anti-American abomination."
a self-described punk calling for censorship of a t-shirt.
only in america.
know what`s really sad? out of everything every celebrity or politician or "website author" has ever said about Bush or Kerry or republicans or democrats or politics in general or anything vaguely relating to that subject...
the slogan on that t-shirt is probably the most honest political statement i`ve come across in the past idontknowHOWmany years!
and it`s brought to us courtesy of URBAN MOTHERFUCKING OUTFITTERS!
Jourgensen, you stupid whiny douche. if yer really a punk, and you have a problem with Urban Outfitters, throw a fuckin molotov cocktail thru their window. otherwise... SHUT YER COCKSUCKER!
i`d also like to say that anyone who cares enough to vote must be under the impression that it actually makes a difference to the functioning of power in the country they live in, and as such, probably masturbates to tom clancy novels and calls in to vote on CNN polls.
voting is for deluded people.
i`m ihatejocks and i approved this message.
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| ya know what`s really amazing? |
| 11.16.04 (12:45 pm) [edit] |
i haven`t brushed my teeth in three days and no one has said a THING!
just kidding. i brush my teeth every day. and now i`m going to have to brush them again becuzzzzzz...
i`m having a coffee right now.
one of those acceptable legal drugs that you can buy at the store.
i don`t like the taste, or the smell of coffee really.. which is why i only drink it when i really need to stay awake.
i would really like an espresso machine, actually so i could get more "bang for my buck."
didn`t think i`d be uttering that sentence this early in the morning. must be the valdez joe!
i think that in twenty years from now, people will be telling their children about how we used to have a Tim Horton`s and McDonald`s on every corner of every flat space in Canada, and how people could buy sandwiches filled with red meat and extra-large cups of caffeine.
and our kids will look at us like "what the fuck was wrong with you?"
kind of like the way i looked at my parents when they told me how Coca-Cola once contained cocaine, and how they all used to be able to smoke cigarettes at work.
i used to drink pepsi all the time to stay awake. then i quit the pepsi, which led to me drinking at least six cups of coffee per day. i think work was a big part of this (having to be up at a certain time and what not), but mostly it was my own sad addiction.
i now drink one cup of coffee per day. it`s rare that i`d drink any more than that these days unless i am really tired at night, and need to "burn the midnight oil."
fuck, what`s with these lame sentences coming out of my brain this morning? ya see what caffeine does to you?!?!
anyway, the reason i still drink one cup a day is cuz of the withdrawl i experienced when i decided to boycott caffeine entirely.
not long ago in my coffee and cigarette days, i woke up one morning and said "fuck this. i never needed caffeine when i was a kid and i don`t need it now. first i`m quitting caffeine. and then i`m quitting smoking. i don`t care how pissy i am, i will not poison my body like this unless it gets me high!"
so i went from six or so cups a day to zero. just like that. (i`m kind of impulsive, or maybe it was the caffeine?)
at around 4 pm the same day, i felt like drawing a bubble bath and slitting my wrists.
how could something as simple as a cuppajoe have such a huge effect on my mood and thought pattern? my emotions were all over the place like i was pregnant er something. and thank cod i wasn`t or my baby would have been a born a java junkie, and its first words probably would have been "non-dairy creamer."
i jumped back on the wagon again to stop the agonizing headaches i was getting, and remedy the shitty mood i was in, but i promised myself i`d only have one "tasse du cafe" per day.
it is now october 27th, 2004 and i am still drinking a cup of coffee per day. why?
cuz i`m addicted.
for your information and/or amusement, here`s a list of some of the drugs i have done in my life (in order of notoriety):
alcohol, nicotine, marijuana, hash, hash-oil, mushrooms, acid, pcp, ecstasy, crystal meth, coke, crack, crank, percodan, codeine, GHB.
here is a list of all the drugs i am currently addicted to:
caffeine.
seems to me the legal drugs are the ones that really get their hooks in ya. look at all those old people at the hospital dragging their iron lungs outside in the cold to have a coffee and a smoke. i`ve never seen any of them snorting blow, have you?
my mom has the same exact addiction as i do right now. she used to drink a lot of coffee and has now cut down to one cup a day. but, like me, if she doesn`t have that one cup, she suffers debilitating headaches starting in the afternoon and lasting well into the night.
i`ve tried to rid of myself of this last cup, mostly cuz i`m curious how long these withdrawl headaches last, if they span more than a week or if they go away a few days after your last java jive.
i`m sure that one day i will kick this last cup, maybe grabbing a big bag of weed and keeping ibuprofen within arm`s reach to deal with the headaches. but i`m concerned about my coffee-drinking brothers and sisters.
my friend gayla once said that she needs a coffee and a cigarette in the morning just to focus her eyes.
we weren`t born with cigarettes and garfield mugs in our hands, were we???
a lot of people who lead an otherwise healthy lifestyle (eating nutritious foods and getting lots of exercise) for some reason still eat or drink caffeine. if not coffee, some people still consume caffeinated soft drinks, drink green tea, maté, or guarana. for lots of people, especially females, it`s chocolate that gives the same strange “pleasure” as the beverages.
the effects of caffeine on the body are well researched, but you never hear about it in your newspaper. you never hear about it anywhere because the whole nation, if not the whole world, is addicted to caffeine. doctors, journalists, scientists, writers, everyone drinks coffee. those whose job it is to inform us are usually heavy coffee drinkers, and few of them ever rise up to diss this popular drug.
but one did.
his name is Stephen Cherniske, and he`s a scientist who spent 10 years of his life researching the effects of caffeine on the body and compiling them in a medical document called “Caffeine Blues.” on the first page of this book we can read:
"Caffeine can`t provide energy, only chemical stimulation and induced emergency state that can lead to irritability, mood swings, and panic attacks...
Caffeine`s ultimate mood effect can be letdown, which can lead to depression and chronic fatigue...
Caffeine gives the illusion of heightened alertness by dilating pupils, quickening heart rate, and raising blood pressure. In fact, caffeine does not increase overall mental activity."
you may have read somewhere, or have been told in school, that as long as caffeine was consumed in moderate quantities, it did not pose any threat to health. once in a while, you may even have read somewhere in the newspaper about the benefits of drinking coffee!
Mr. Cherniske responds:
“I had been told only that caffeine was a mild stimulant and its association with health disorders was unproven. I was also told that caffeine is not addictive. Since I knew from my own painful experience that the opposite was true, I reasoned that perhaps I had been snowed on the whole topic.
What I quickly learned was that everyone has been snowed — researchers, doctors, journalists, and especially the public. The deception has been well coordinated by an industry whose goal is quite simple: to get as much caffeine into our bodies as possible.
The caffeine industry knows caffeine saps your natural sense of vitality, leaving you dependent on their products to get through the day. They know that you actually crave their products and, more importantly, that you suffer when you don`t consume them.
It`s a marketing dream, and it`s legal. No wonder more and more companies are jumping on the caffeine bandwagon, churning out products from specialized coffees and teas to `herbal` caffeinated energy pills, caffeinelaced fruit beverages, `supercharged` soft drinks, caffeinated beer, and even caffeinated bottled water.”
i once worked with a girl named Vicky, who told me that in addition to drinking coffee and other caffeinated drinks, she also took a caffeine pill in the morning and one at lunch to help her "get through the day."
she was the most annoying girl on the fucking planet.
caffeine is a poison. the body has absolutely no use for it as it is a danger to its living function. it must detoxify it through the liver and reject it with great effort. the “stimulation” we feel after drinking coffee is nothing more than the expended effort in eliminating this poison. which is probably why it makes people piss and shit so much.
Herbert Shelton clearly explained the delusion of stimulation in his classic book, “Orthobionomics”...
“Whenever any irritating substance or influence is brought to bear upon the living organism this occasions vital resistance and excitation manifested by increased and impaired action, which, always necessarily diminishes the power of action and does so in precisely the degree to which it accelerates action; the increased action is caused by the extra expenditure of vital power called out, not supplied, by the compulsory process, and therefore the available supply of power is diminished by this amount... Under all circumstances, vitality or energy of any character whatever is invariably manifested or noticed by us, as energy, in its expenditure, never in its accumulation.”
in other words, what appears to give us energy may be draining our energy, as is the case with caffeine. the stimulation people get from drinking coffee is an expenditure of vital forces, not real energy which can only come from rest.
large portions of Cherniske`s book piggybacks on Shelton`s theory:
“Caffeine does not provide energy — only chemical stimulation. The perceived energy comes from the body`s struggle to adapt to increased blood levels of stress hormones... Using coffee for mood enhancement is a short-term blessing and a long-term curse. While the initial adrenal stimulation may provide a transient anti-fatigue ‘lift,’ caffeine`s ultimate mood effect is a letdown, either subtle or profound. Advertisers and coffee `institutes` have kept this side of caffeine from public view... While caffeine users may feel more alert, the experience is simply one of increased sensory and motor activity (dilated pupils, increased heart rate, and higher blood pressure). The quality of thought and recall is improved no more than the quality of music is improved when played at a higher volume or speed.”
when you actually break it down logically, the energy we get from caffeine is similar to the “energy” a horse gets when whipped. it is not energy gained but power spent responding to an injury.
as for people becoming "tolerant" to caffeine, Cherniske writes:
“What is tolerable for one person may be excessive for another. Moreover, what is tolerable caffeine intake at some point in your life may actually cause health problems just a few years later.”
we often hear that caffeine is only bad when consumed in excess, but when taken in small quantities it is not dangerous, and could even be beneficial, raising mental alertness. but since when can a poison be good for you?
the truth is that finding a "moderate coffee drinker" anywhere in this world is very rare. because, like any other drug, coffee is addictive! so almost every consumer eventually ends up drinking more than they did when they first started. the “average person” in a research is a big myth anyway. this person described by scientists in their research papers when they statistically analyze caffeine consumption simply does not exist. not everyone reacts to a poison the same way, not everyone can detoxify it at the same rate, and not everyone consumes the same dose.
those who are purified by, for example, a raw vegan diet, will react more strongly to caffeine than the average person. children are more affected too, because their organism is purer. so the same dose of caffeine will have a completely different effect on different people, which illustrates the bullshitosity of recommending “moderation” because it doesn`t mean anything. moderation can only concern the healthy factors of life, not those that are damaging to it. moderation in them is impossible, as any quantity will be an excess.
coffee beans were used as a drug long before they were used as food. a large percentage of today`s pharmaceutical drugs still contain caffeine as one of their “active ingredients.” it wasn`t until the thirteenth century that Arab monks figured out that roasted coffee beans could be made into a drink, and that in addition to making your breath smell like a vietnamese weasel`s ass, it could also keep you awake! no more falling asleep at prayers! the news spread from monastery to monastery, and eventually hit the streets.
when coffee was first brought to European cities in the seventeenth century, people were disgusted by its color and taste. they complained that it smelled and looked like roofing tar. but after they experienced its stimulating effect, the beverage was quickly proclaimed to be one of nature`s miracles. historians record this phenomenon without noticing the irony of what they are writing. caffeine is, after all, a psychoactive drug, and human beings tend to crave substances that alter their states among them caffeine, morphine, nicotine, and cocaine. all of these alkaloids are chemically related and, while they produce widely different effects, all are poisonous.
coffee has since conquered the world to the point where almost everyone drinks coffee, if not tea, if not another type of caffeinated beverage (like pepsi). americans, the big fat masters of excess, are obviously the largest coffee drinkers in the world, with a record of 420 million cups per day.
in addition to caffeine, coffee contains hundreds of volatile substances including more than 200 acids. the body has to reject these acids by a great expense of energy, which is the strange stimulation we perceive as “energy.”
caffeine is a biological poison used by plants as a pesticide. the caffeine gives seeds and leaves a bitter taste, which discourages their consumption by insects and animals. if predators persist in eating a caffeine-containing plant, the caffeine can cause central nervous system disruptions and even lethal side effects. most pests soon learn to leave the plant alone. but humans have fooled their instincts and tastes bud and transformed coffee into a drinkable beverage, often mixed with cream and sugar. same thing with chocolate. no one would ever think of eating cocoa beans, because they taste like shit. so we mix it with sugar and fat and call it chocolate. but our sense of taste was right in detecting that poison, used by the plant as a pesticide to repel insects.
caffeine, like theobromine (found in chocolate), has to be detoxified by the liver, and injures it overtime, just like alcohol. but caffeine is not the only toxic substance in coffee. coffee contains a host of chemicals, among them a group of extremely toxic compounds known as polycyclic aromatic hydrocarbons (PAHs). you might remember them as the cancer-causing agents isolated from barbecued meat.
impaired digestion is more of a problem than most people realize, and caffeine just makes it worse. the 32-oz pepsi or the double espresso we have with meals is a major contributor to the bloating that many adults experience after they eat, and these symptoms are only the physical signs of indigestion. we can`t see the harmful by-products of fermentation and putrefaction. some of these by-products are absorbed back into the bloodstream, and the toxins that stay in the gut increase your risk of gastrointestinal disease.
there is an insanely popular notion that coffee before 12pm can`t disturb your sleep. in fact, caffeine at any time of the day can cause sleep problems, especially if you are under stress.
caffeine disturbs the most important phase of sleep, the deep-sleep phase. it`s a vicious circle: caffeine intake leads to decreased sleep quantity, which leads to increased caffeine intake, which leads to decreased sleep quality, which leads to disease and fatigue, which leads to increased caffeine intake, et cetera et cetera.
another popular myth is that caffeine-related problems are mostly experienced by people in the workforce. in reality, those hardest hit appear to be the elderly. even though seniors tend to cut back on coffee, the caffeine they do ingest is detoxified much more slowly and their nervous systems are much more sensitive than those of younger people. research (by Cherniske and his students) is now starting to show that sleep disturbance among the elderly is a major factor not only in age-related physical degeneration but in mental degeneration as well.
so if you want to jump to conclusions, caffeine could be largely responsible for dementia, alzheimers and/or early senility.
research recently published in the Annals of Nutrition and Metabolism found that caffeine increased potassium loss by nearly one-third. mineral loss appears to be accelerated when caffeine is mixed with sugar. the reason this happens is that caffeine impairs the kidney`s ability to hold on to calcium, magnesium, and other minerals like zinc and iron.
probably my favorite part of Cherniske`s book (by the way, if anyone wants to borrow it, i will glady mail it to them) is when he writes about caffeine and mental illness, and talks about his own caffeine addiction:
"I have known for a long time that even a moderate caffeine intake may cause a small depression, (the blues). I have noticed this on myself a couple of years ago when I started drinking green tea, thinking that this beverage only had a tiny amount of caffeine in it. I couldn`t fall asleep before 2 a.m. and started to experience a mild depression. As soon as I discarded the green tea, it went away. How many people feel depressed and tired for no apparent reason? And how many of them drink coffee or tea and can`t give it up?
If a person were injected with 500 milligrams of caffeine, within an hour he or she would exhibit symptoms of severe mental illness, among them, hallucinations, paranoia, panic, mania, and depression. But the same amount of caffeine administered over the course of a day only produces the milder forms of insanity for which we take tranquilizers and antidepressants.”
now back to the headaches.
millions of people suffer from headaches and thousands of these millions are migraine sufferers. a person with a headache doesn’t know that it was caused or triggered by caffeine, so he or she looks for a painkiller (analgesic).
in probably 99.9 percent of cases, the analgesic drug contains caffeine. the painkillers work, especially if the headaches were caused by caffeine withdrawal, but the caffeine in the painkiller ultimately triggers another headache. ultimately, the sufferer becomes dependent on the painkiller for even a smidgen of relief, but the headaches increase in frequency and intensity. this may go on for many years, creating a cycle of pain and depression that destroys the quality of life.
a caffeine deprivation (withdrawal) headache results from the normal opening (dilation) of blood vessels that are constricted by caffeine. in other words, habitual caffeine intake keeps blood vessels in the brain constricted. when caffeine is not consumed, these blood vessels return to their normal blood-flow potential, and it is this increased circulation in the brain that causes the caffeine withdrawal headache.
my fellow hippies out there might be interested to know the ecological side of coffee-production. coffee is the most important crop in the world. more than wheat, rice, corn, or livestock. more than fruit, more than vegetables, or any other staple crop... coffee is number one. more than cars, more than steel, more than everything, only third next to petroleum and some metals used to make weapons. the reason?
coffee is a drug, nearly everyone is addicted to it, and it’s part of the culture.
coffee also happens to be one of the most heavily sprayed agricultural crops. in the countries where it is grown, there are few restrictions concerning pesticide use, where there are fewer laws to protect workers and the environment. coffee plantations use huge amounts of pesticides that pollute the land, rivers, and destroy plant and animal life around them. the beans go off to market, but what happens to coffee pulp and the processing water? this water, now laden with pesticides, fungicides, and nitrogenous waste, goes directly into local streams, rivers, and lakes. with no filtration or reconditioning, the water pollution harms aquatic life as well as the health of people who live alongside those same bodies of water. and the coffee pulp? it sits in huge, rotting piles, leaching out its high nitrogen discharge into the groundwater and eventually into the same polluted waterways.
Cherniske mentions in his book how coffee plantations have probably contributed to the destruction of Rain Forests more than any other crop in the world, since large portions of the forest are destroyed every year to make room for the coffee plantations.
coffee culture is labor-intensive and requires large portions of land and resources. these are astronomical numbers once you get your calculator out and consider that the world demand for coffee is 13 billion pounds a year. since the average plant produces one to two pounds of roasted coffee a year, this will require 7 billion trees. judging from what the average farmer can get from one acre, it ends up that 70 million acres are devoted to grow this non-food, this drug, this poison that contributes to human suffering and ruins the health of the millions without their being aware of it.
70 million acres devoted to the culture of coffee. think about that. 70 fucking MILLION acres... If we add to that the land devoted to cacao culture (for making chocolate), tea leaves culture, sugar cane (for making sugar), and grape culture (for making of wine), i don`t even want to try and calculate it. hundreds of millions of acres of the most fertile land in the world exclusively devoted to the culture of non-foods and beverages that contribute to the suffering of humanity. why even talk about a lack of food? we’re just cultivating the wrong plants for the wrong purposes!
quite possibly the most humorous "side effect" of caffeine is the current corruption of the health food industry.
remember health food?
if you do, then you`ve probably noticed how much the industry has changed, as the original visionaries sold out to conglomerates for whom profit superceded health principles. the proliferation of organic coffee bins in natural food stores took off in the early nineties (or maybe late eighties?) and before you knew it, manufacturers of health food products discovered what the food and beverage industry has known for decades: caffeine sells.
if you want to boycott caffeine, you could start by drinking non-caffeinated "calm down" teas (like sage or chamomile), and eating fruit bars (like FruitToGo) instead of chocolate.
i`d recommend a radical approach to caffeine reduction, like cutting down to one cup of coffee a day like yers truly. if you think this would be too much of a shock to yer system, then try the replacement method instead, with the herbal tea and dried fruit bars.
there is also a new product called “Teeccino” that brews like regular coffee but doesn`t have any caffeine or coffee beans. it`s made from dates, figs, carob, barley, and sounds absolutely disgusting. it can be found in many health food stores or you can order it from: www.teeccino.com
some things to remember:
anyone suffering from insomnia or anxiety (panic) attacks, should not consume ANY caffeine.
caffeine can be found in chocolate, green tea, earl grey tea, orange pekoe tea, mate tea, iced tea, guarana, kola nut, as well as lots of other "herbal" teas, analgesics and decongestants like ephedra.
eating an apple wakes you up in the morning (try it!)
using coffee to remedy constipation is the same thing as relying on laxatives. either way, you`re using a drug to induce shitting. use epsom salts or mineral oil instead.
remember kids, drugs are evil and coffee is one powerful drug.
it sure makes you write a lot though!
sing it fellas
luv,
juan
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| mister and missus tenorman chili |
| 11.16.04 (12:43 pm) [edit] |
alrite listen up you fuckin homos, i just made up the best chili recipe in the history of THE WORLD!
it`s buttfuckingly easy, doesn`t require any sauteeing, and you could easily double, triple, quadruple (et cetera) the recipe for a big group of people.
Jamie Oliver (aka the Naked Chef) claims he has the best chili ever.
fuck you, you DAFT WANKAH! stick to making SUFFERIN SUCCOTASH, i think it`s raining on yer cutting board ya lispy brit!
freshen ya drink guv`na!
first of all, the show`s called The Naked Chef, but he`s not naked!
WEAK.
and second of all, my chili is better.
you will need to steal:
1 can of diced tomatoes (undrained)
1 little can of tomato paste
1 pound of veggie ground, or TVP (or "meat," if yer into that. cow or human baby will work nicely)
1 can of red kidney beans
4 (or more?) garlic cloves
1 TB of brown sugar
now, throw all this shit into a big pot and turn it to medium-high.
then throw in: cumin, salt, black pepper, cayenne pepper, 1/4 tsp of white pepper, a 1/4 tsp of basil and finally some vietnamese hot sauce. i recommend Tuong Ot Sriracha (the one with the rooster on it). if you don`t have this, i guess you`ll have to put in a whole bunch of shitty caucasian tabasco sauce.
instead of the cayenne pepper, you could just add a chili, jalapeno or scotch bonnet pepper (with the seeds). i didn`t have any peppers when i made it though, so i used cayenne cuz i`m cool like that.
now cook this crazy concoction until it starts to bubble, then turn it down to low and simmer for an hour.
at the half-hour mark, throw in another round of spices, minus the white pepper, basil and hot sauce.
now go stuff your face before i make you eat your parents!
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| mensa's standards reach all-time low |
| 11.16.04 (12:42 pm) [edit] |
after suffering health problems and misfortunes in her social life, Sharon Stone, the "sexy" actress known best for showing her cooch in Basic Instinct, has a political agenda.
like most celebrities, Sharon Stone wants rid of Bush. since it's too easy to make a joke about the previous sentence, i'll just say that while i agree with her stance on the upcoming american election, she does not know jack shit about politics and should really just shut the hell up before she embarrasses herself.
oops, too late!
this member of Mensa International (yep, it's true!) was actually quoted by a website in Ireland as uttering the following statement about her role in that stupid Catwoman movie:
"I was prevented from filming a lesbian scene with Halle Berry because the current conservative climate in the country just wouldn't allow it. Halle is so beautiful, I just wanted to kiss her. That's what you get for having George Bush as president."
in September of 2001, Sharon Stone was hospitalized with bleeding of the brain, which could offer some explanation for the above statement. since that time her career has been on the road to ruin. Sharon claimed they started treating her like a sick person in Hollywood, which lead to directors refusing to work with her.
so THAT'S why she's not in movies anymore!
and all this time i thought it was just her shitty acting that prevented her from getting roles!
after recent hardships (an operation and divorce) Sharon Stone describes her current situation as a catastrophe. the actress said such sad experience was like a shot in the head for her. furthermore, the ex-sex symbol fears a lot for her own life and health. Sharon still has to undergo various examinations, which stress her out completely. for example, one of her toes still grows numb at times!!!
Sharon also told the Irish press that her disapproval of Bush does not only stem from the prevented lesbo action in Catwoman (as if he had anything to do with that). Sharon said that Bush is "a fascist dictator who has spent billions of the taxpayers' money, when that money could have been spent on something much more productive."
i agree. there's kids in ethiopia who want food right now.
speaking of kids in ethiopia, here is a scanned copy of Sharon Stone's five-page rider (her demands from the producers of each movie she's in), courtesy of The Smoking Gun.
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| i wear a solid gold toupee |
| 11.16.04 (12:42 pm) [edit] |
donald trump is supposedly this really intelligent, savvy business dude, yet everytime he talks people listening get dumber.
this guy`s latest new brilliant marketing idea is to sell Donald Trump boardgames (be the donald) as well as t-shirts with "You`re Fired" printed on them, the "catchy" slogan from his sucky television show.
yyyyeeeahh
these will sell like hotcakes!
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| a community of love and hope |
| 11.16.04 (12:41 pm) [edit] |
my new job is hard and fucks up my social life.
i like it.
i`m a quoteunquote support worker! i find that very funny and strange but i`m gonna be the best damn support worker this world has ever seen!
... well ok, maybe the 347th best.
i know what some of you are probably thinking. "how the fuck is this guy qualified to give other people suggestions on how to make their lives better?"
in all honesty, i am as surprised and outraged as you.
i wouldn`t hire a guy like me unless i was attempting to get fired from my hiring job.
my music students dont know that i hang out with murderers and sex offenders all day, and neither do their parents, which i guess is a good thing. however, my boss and the other music teachers are fully aware. its actually led to a constant fountain of lame questions pouring from their mouths. "so are there any murderers?" "isn`t it depressing working there?" "have you ever been attacked?"
fags
the worst part about fulltime work isn`t necessarily the stress, or even the showering. it`s the lost time. i could be doing so much more with my time, but i`m happy to keep this job for awhile. at least i`m doing something somewhat meaningful, and i feel good when i`m done my shift. plus they give a quarter of everyone`s paycheques to United Way which is pretty cool if you ask me. i kinda like this job. despite the religious connotations, the fact that they give urine tests to known drug users (gay), and the fact that their main goal is to help the homeless men and ex-cons find jobs (as if a minimum wage job is gonna stop them from selling drugs and robbing people). but the talks i have with these people are really deep and make me think a lot about my own life. plus the program manger Carmine (my boss) is the most emotionally open and sincerely loving guy i have ever met. he`s a musclebound manly italian dude (hence the catholocism) who boxes in the middleweights and loves star wars. despite his manliness he is always telling every guy in there, including staff how important it is to spread love and kindness. you just can`t hate him. i`ve tried and it`s just fuckin impossible. and even tho i am uncomfortable with lots of stuff in that place (the religious stuff and what not), i can see he is really trying his best to better everyone`s lives in what he considers to be the right ways to do this, which is definitely cool and totally earns my respect and "bigups."
i`m also glad they only give urine tests to the residents.
me and a co-worker had a somewhat humorous conversation recently...
co-worker 1: if any of the residents tells you they have committed a recent crime, you are obliged to report it to the program manager, by law. but you could always pretend you didn`t hear it.
co-worker 2: that is probably what i would do, actually.
co-worker 1: it`s your call.
co-worker 2: so what happens if i choose to report it?
co-worker 1: the next day we have the resident do a urinalysis test to see if he is under the influence of any non-prescription drugs.
co-worker 2: i see...
(long silence)
um.. are any of the... employEES... required to pass... drug tests?
co-worker 1: (smiles) for informational purposes?
co-worker 2: exactly.
co-worker 1: no, they are not.
co-worker 2: SPLENDID!
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| "kiss off" by violent femmes |
| 11.16.04 (12:40 pm) [edit] |
I need someone a person to talk to
Someone who’d care to love
Could it be you could it be you
Situation gets rough then I start to panic
It’s not enough it’s just a habit
Hey kid your sick well darling this is it
You can all just kiss off into the air
Behind my back I can see them stare
They’ll hurt me bad but I won’t mind
They’ll hurt me bad they do it all the time
Yeah yeah they do it all the time
I hope you know that this will go down
On your permanent record
Oh yeah well don’t get so distressed
Did I happen to mention that I’m impressed
I take one one one cause you left me and
Two two two for my family and
three three three for my heartache and
four four four for my headaches and
five five five for my lonely and
six six six for my sorrow and
seven seven n-n-n-n-no tomorrow and
eight eight I forget what eight was for but
nine nine for a lost God and
ten ten ten ten for everything
Everything everything everything
You can all just kiss off into the air
Behind my back I can see them stare
They’ll hurt me bad but I won’t mind
They’ll hurt me bad they do it all the time
Yeah yeah they do it all the time
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| let`s EJ the night away |
| 11.16.04 (12:40 pm) [edit] |
okay. i`ll admit that while the actual concept of EJ`ing (ee-JAY-ing) is pretty cool, calling it EJ`ing is really gay.
in case you don`t know what i`m talking about, Electronic Jockeying or... "EJ`ING" is when a DJ hooks up his/her turntable to a computer via a MIDI cable, and can control the movement of digital film to coincide with a certain rhythm when scratching.
it`s a fun idea and the videos moving in time to the EJ`s scratching does look pretty cool. i think the Blueman group used it for one of their videos.
they interviewed an EJ on TV who said "it`s more than just a new style of music, it`s like this whole like culture and sub-genre and blablabbla it`s like a new movement and stuff!"
ya pleeze. it`s just a cool idea stupid, let`s not tard out over it ok.
UH DUH i`m an EJ! i`m part of a movement
more like E-GAY
hehehe...
sweet
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| taking it slow |
| 11.16.04 (12:39 pm) [edit] |
so do you think if a retarded 40-yr-old man who was mentally 12 fell in love with a 12-yr-old girl... would that be kosher?
and no, the girl isn`t retarded. she`s healthy and normal and UNretarded!
i can`t decide what would be the appropriate age of consent. wouldn`t we have to adjust it every time TV gets "hotter?" not that it can get any hotter what with all the donald trump shows and all.
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| writing like people talk |
| 11.16.04 (12:39 pm) [edit] |
"Some people hold beliefs that are clearly delusional÷that have absolutely no connection to reality. And they persist in holding these beliefs even when not a shred of evidence can be produced to support them. And no, I'm not talking about people who believe in UFOs, reincarnation, and the Loch Ness Monster. And I'm also not talking about people who believe in some supreme spiritual entity.
I'm talking about people who believe that 'weapons of mass destruction' have been uncovered in Iraq . . . who believe that 'weapons of mass destruction' were used against our troops over there . . . who even believe that 'weapons of mass destruction' is something other than a arbitrary term cooked up recently by Uncle Sam to describe weapons systems possessed by our 'enemies,' regardless of the actual destructive capability of those systems.
The functionally insane also believe that Iraqis were among the hijackers who allegedly commandeered the planes on September 11, 2001. It is difficult to fathom, but these people are so crazed that they have actually taken the government's already fanciful conspiracy theory, which is itself totally disconnected from reality, and they have made it even more ludicrous by adding some Iraqis to the mix. I'm betting that a few years down the road these same people will also believe that there were a couple of Liberians on one of the planes, as well as an Iranian guy, a couple of North Koreans, a Syrian, and perhaps a Cuban or two. Maybe even a French couple.
It's the damnedest thing, but in addition to holding these bizarre beliefs, these people can't even seem to see the walls going up. Perhaps that is the silver lining in being completely insane: when you are that thoroughly disconnected from reality, you don't even know that you are living in an asylum.
And so it is that we see the functionally insane behaving as though they still live outside the walls .. as though nothing has changed in their lives . . . as though their children haven't been stripped of any sort of meaningful future. You see these people everywhere, walking around without a care in the world, discussing who should have won the last American Idol, who the newest Bachelor should choose as his soul mate, whether a professional bodybuilder would make a better or worse governor than a professional wrestler, and whether Dr. Phil gives better relationship advice than Dr. Laura."
-David McGowan, author of "Derailing Democracy"-
In the above paragraphs, McGowan is referring to Americans as "functionally insane," but I have met a lot of people who fit this description all over Canada too. old men with bumper stickers that say "licensed terrorist hunter," or perhaps the funniest statement ever... families with the half-american half-canadian flags in their window that say "We're With You."
i feel like knocking on these peoples' doors and saying "hey, i just rented a bus, ya ready to go to the airport? flight to iraq leaves in half an hour."
ignorance over here is evolving to a new plateau. and what's worse is that the uneducated, perception-retarded, localnews-watching IDIOTS are always the first ones to step up to the plate and GIVE THEIR POLITICAL OPINION! fuck!
i have no problem hearing differing opinions from people. i love it! i have a friend whose thoughts on a subject are almost always different from what i'd expect. i can never predict her opinions, and they're always so different from mine. it's fun to see things from someone else's perspectives, and really try your hardest to understand where they're coming from. it's a total learning experience!
what i don't like is hearing opinions from people who don't know what the fuck they're talking about. and you people.. you KNOW who you are! you do absolutely no research or exploration of any kind on the subject, you only watch local news, you couldn't point out Iraq on a fucking MAP, but go figure, you have an opinion on the war!
so there's a guy on this site who shall remain nameless (WhYs_my_RuM_gonE.. oops) and his journal is just FULL of extreme right-wing, republican bullcrap. every single sentence this guy prints makes me wanna throw him out a window. and yet... i can't stop reading his journal. while i totally disagree with what he's saying, i have to respect it because he actually KNOWS what he's talking about. he's obviously very politically minded, and probably researches politics as much, if not more than i do. i can't stop reading his journal in the same way i can't look away from a televised documentary about george bush. it drives me absolutely fucking nuts, but life would be boring if everyone thought exactly like you. and websites with journals would sure suck, too i might add.
when i first came on this site (bigups to sputnikbunny, hydrahponix, scarymary), i didn't know if guys would be very receptive to me messaging them. as you might have guessed, i'm not too into the whole "matchmaking website" thing (real live people smell better), the only reason i stayed on this thing is cuz i'm allowed to publish my blog here.
i do post a lot in newsgroups, though (for those who don't know, newsgroups are like the Forums that used to be on here) and i've noticed a lot of males don't like to receive messages from other males, unless they are ABOUT a specific topic. like if some guy posts a message "To All" that says "hey i need help making a birdhouse," then it's socially acceptable for another guy to reply with birdhouse-making instructions. but i found a lot of resistance when i tried to just TALK with guys on a philosophical level, unless they're gay or bi.
for some reason, guys don't seem to be afraid to speak their mind to other guys on this site, and i am so totally, genuinely fuckin surprised! most of my non-internet friends are girls, and i mostly talk to females online too, but i have some amazingly interesting and thought-provoking conversations with the sexy hunks of man-meat on "so would you doink me!" maybe i've just met stupid guys in newsgroups... or maybe, just maybe... this website can serve as the catalyst for a boy/boy revolution! PENIS-OWNERS UNITE!!! may we never discuss sports EVER... AGAIN!!!!!!!!!
sorry... ok, i'm fine now. so anyway, i was chatting on msn with another member of this site, who shall remain nameless (fer real this time) and she asked me who was my favorite journal-writer out of all ya'll. i admit i had to think about it for a long time, but i finally decided on one journal, written by a fellow penis-owner.
"that's weird," my friend remarked. "all of your favorite book authors are female."
"ya," i said. "how about that?"
she then asked "so what's your favorite GIRL JOURNAL then?"
i thought about it for so fuckin long, and i have to confess i still can't decide. there's just way too many good ones, and all of them good for totally different reasons. i felt stupid for not coming up with one, so i at least had to recommend SOMETHING to her. i said "well there's a journal i've really been getting into lately. it's definitely not my favorite, but check it out anyway," and i sent her the link.
after reading four entries, she sent me this message:
"that is the most immature, self-absorbed drivel i've ever read. you obviously just like this girl's journal cuz she's hot."
to those reading this, my friend's comment about the (very) hot girl's journal probably sounds like she's jealous, but she is totally not the jealous type. i definitely understand why she jumped to this conclusion, tho. it's because this certain girl's style of writing is what most people would deem "uneducated." the punctuation is all wrong, capitalization is random, and she includes words like "umm" and "woohoo."
i'm sure george orwell would say she doesn't use enough similes or metaphors or onomatofuckinpiea or however you spell that. and according to traditional writing style, i guess he'd be right.
but FUCK traditional writing style. it's traditional writing that makes kids think reading is boring in the first place!
writers who pay too much attention to other writers' styles ultimately end up sounding exactly like them, and it's fucking BORING!
furthermore, i think that i'm mature enough to NOT do that.. like something made by a good-looking person, just becuz he or she happens to be attractive. at the risk of sounding like a pretentious art critic, i like journals written by normal, everyday people. that's why this blogging shit is such a cool idea! i love writing that sounds like the way people naturally talk, which is what i've always tried to do with mine! cuz i love reading stuff that sounds like it came flying straight from the writer's head and onto the page, instead of the flowery, pedantic "author" writing that's way too common nowadays, and stinks of stale rigidity, like a painting of a fruit basket or flowers in a vase. i'd much rather read a journal written by someone with no formal training, than a smug, self-serving work, dispassionately written according to the rules.
so anywho, i gotta go cut off my penis. i'm broadcasting it over the web tonight for anyone who wants to electronically kiss it goodbye!
i hope i don't start stalking jeri ryan.
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| one of these things just doesn't belong here |
| 11.16.04 (12:37 pm) [edit] |
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| diamonds are forever |
| 11.16.04 (12:36 pm) [edit] |
i was very bored and insomniacal last night so i turned on the "telly." i thought Trailer Park Boys was gonna be on, but instead they were thoughtful enough to transmit an old episode of Blind Date instead.
now i`ve seen my fair share of shitty TV shows, but Blind Date is probably the only one that actually makes me consider killing myself.
there`s something remarkably strange about seeing two people you`d NEVER want to meet go out on a date. every girl on that show is so fucking high maintenance and vapid, and the guys are completely devoid of any social skills, either picking fights with the girls to hide their intimidation, or talking about sex the whole time cuz they haven`t had any in years. it makes perfect sense to match them up really, cuz what kind of fucked-up person would actually agree to go on a blind date and have it taped for live TV?? people like this DESERVE to meet each other. let`s pair them up, get them out of harm`s way and hope they die before they can reproduce.
my favorite part about Blind Date is how they thoughtfully pair race with race, like a fuckin Old Navy ad er something. black guy goes with black girl, asian guy goes with asian girl. interracial or homosexual dates are out of the question, though. sorry... this show is for normal, god-fearing people only. sheeps and goats don`t mix.
then there`s the host, Rodger Lodge, giving dating tips to us lucky viewers at home. we`re apparently supposed to believe that this guy ISN`T a 40-year-old virgin.
during the dinner part of the date, the guy and girl were giving each other the third degree to avoid any uncomfortable silence so they`re like "what kinda music do you like?" "what`s your favorite color" "what are your feelings on french fries?" basically, the type of conversation that makes you want to leave the table to go sit on a toilet and suck on a 12-gauge.
then all of a sudden, the girl decided to get a bit more personal and asked the guy "how old was the youngest girl you ever dated?" the guy said "eighteen," and then the girl asked "how old were you?" to which he replied twenty-seven." the girl`s eyes bulged out like someone had just stuck a carrot up her ass, and she silently judged the guy for the rest of the evening. the date was already over in her mind. now granted, this guy was a total douche in a more ways than i could possibly count, but listening to the girl talk was about as exciting as a Tom Clancy novel, so i was pretty pissed at her apparent moral superiority.
what`s the age line with you?
you, the reader, i mean. where do you draw the line, put your foot down, close the drawbridge, bricklay the wall?
how young is too young? how old is too old?
if you have an answer... where the hell did you get it from?
i have friends ranging in age from 16 to 40. i`ve met lots of mature, intelligent, self-aware 16-year olds. and i`ve met lots of braindead 40-year olds, too. i`ve met mind-numbingly boring people who have graduated from respected universities. and i`ve met amazingly interesting people who have never been to high school. just because you grow old, it doesn`t mean you get wiser. age does not define maturity.
when i was 25, i hooked up with a 17-year-old. does that make you feel weird? think i`m a perv er something? or maybe you`re thinking "he should know better than to blablabla" or "she`s not mature enough to blablabla." think what you want, and have fun judging our relationship.
do you believe that we choose who we fall in love with?
right now, we are both a year older, and we are still the best of friends. i`m not ashamed of our past or present relationship. i really don`t care who knows about it, what my friends say, or what anyone thinks about the age difference. especially strangers. i`m one hundred percent positive we respect each other a lot more than any of the jerry-springerish type of lovebirds who would have something to say about our age difference.
when i was 19, i made friends with a 34-yr-old. naturally, all of my friends (and all of hers) had something to say. funny they did too, considering it was none of their business. as tactful as some people were, all of their comments came out sounding kind of like this to me:
"You shouldn`t do that, because i wouldn`t!"
whenever i talk about the ridiculousness of "drawing a line on age," someone always brings up child pornography, as if to say "we have to draw a line SOMEWHERE don`t we? otherwise 20-yr-old guys will go around fucking 8-yr-old girls!"
really?
i wouldn`t.
cuz i personally think that`s fucking disgusting.
but since it`s always being brought up, let`s talk about WHY some adults out there choose to force little kids into having sex with them.
let`s talk about TV again. let`s talk about this superficial world we live in, where our favorite pasttime is watching a flickering box, and on this flickering box.. sex is crammed down our throats every five seconds, being portrayed as some life-affirming finish line that guys everywhere must cross in order to fulfill their manhood. let`s talk about a world where girls have been treated like sperm receptacles by guys for so fucking long, they are now starting to treat guys like walking penises, both genders using each other as sex toys.
boy meets girl. boy and girl let each other know that reciprocal love depends on how good you are in bed.
if you`re pussy`s not tight enough, you`re no longer worth it.
if you can`t get it up, you`re not a real man.
in a world that tells us the opposite sex will judge us mercilessly for not living up to certain standards... is there any wonder why grown men would choose to fuck an 8-year-old girl whose oblivious to their sexual shortcomings, rather than... well... going on a Blind Date?
Laura Sclater, a 31-year-old teacher from Barrie Ontario, was recently acquitted of criminal charges for her relationship with a 13-year-old male student. the boy`s parents turned her in when they found love notes she had written to the boy, in which she referred to him as a "hottie" and a "big stud."
both the teacher and the boy claimed they were in love, and maybe they were. i`m not saying i think their relationship was healthy or "right," but neither was Jerry Lee Lewis marrying is cousin, or Woody Allen marrying his stepdaughter, or Anna Nicole Smith marrying that dead guy, or Pamela Anderson marrying ANYBODY.
when i was in grade 9, i had a huge crush on my english teacher. and if we ever fucked, i would probably think i was in love with her, just like every boy thinks they`re in love with the first girl they sleep with.
maybe this 31-year-old woman was tired of dating jaded old men with ulterior motives who smell like coffee, pee and beer. maybe she wanted unconditional (albeit immature) love, instead of the fake affection and feigned interest she experienced while dating those in her own age group.
for the past three of four decades it seems, guys were the assholes and girls had to just DEAL. the boys would fuck the grrls and not call them or go out with them. and grrls just put up with it. but now the grrls are starting to do the same thing to guys, using them for a quick lay and not talking to them again. so now they`re assholes too and while i guess it`s justified, it sure isn`t empowering. it`s all backwards now. neither gender is empowered when we are both being treated like walking genitals, instead of connecting on a non-sexual level to have real human moments with each other.
my immature 18-year-old friend lisa had this to say:
"i hate girls my age today. they dont set up guys well anymore. the only decent guys are the older generation, not guys my age. and it`s all our fault. girls my age dont speak up, or take time to make sure a guy is totally looked after in any department, not even communication. so all guys are ill-equipped with whats needed to make a good guy."
i`d like to just say i agree, and what`s even more disturbing is that girls today are so used to guys saying ANYTHING to get in their pants, that when a guy tries to reach out and actually understand them, learn from them and experience them as PEOPLE and not just talking vaginas, a lot of grrls would understandably come back with an attitude like "don`t pretend you know what it`s like to be female, yer just like all the other guys!"
it`s obvious to recognize the unproductive situation we`re all in. it would kind of be like black people saying "we don`t need you whites to help out at our civil rights march!"
Marlon Pagtakhan was sentenced in 2001 to five years probation for sending hundreds of sexually explicit emails to actress Jeri Ryan (or "Seven of Nine" to all you star trek geeks), and threatening violence to her boyfriend, Brannon Braga, executive director of "Star Trek Voyager." her stalker was apparently a enuch due to a botched circumsion, and authored his own website all about Jeri. when she filed a restraining order against him, he scanned it and posted it up on the site. before he was finally arrested, he made a video of himself in which he chastised Jeri for filing the restraining order, and said he would kill her boyfriend, as well as members of her family.
that guy has likely never known what it is to truly love someone, because a guy can`t fall in love if he doesn`t have a dick.
a friend of mine, janelle, who lives in the states hooked up with a 22-year-old guy when she was 17. i was the same age as her, and knew for a fact she had sex with guys before, as we used to talk openly about it all the time. before she slept with this particular guy, she had told me she was going to try to get with him cuz he was hawt and she wanted him really bad. a few weeks later she called me, really upset. when i asked what was wrong she told me that her dad had found out about her relationship with this guy, and had charged him with statutory rape. in addition to this, he was also charged with distributing alcohol to a minor (cuz they were both found drinking in a hotel room).
despite my friend`s assurances to the cops that the sexual encounter was entirely her idea, they sent the guy to jail and he had to take a "Sex For Dummies" type of class as if he was a peeping tom or a door-to-door panty thief. this guy didn`t go to jail because he did something wrong. he went to jail cuz daddy couldn`t handle the idea that his little girl liked to fuck.
awhile after that, janelle sent me an article from her town`s local paper about her boyfriend being charged. it said:
"A 22-year-old man was charged with statutory rape and distributing alcohol to a minor, after police discovered an inebriated 17-year-old girl in his hotel room."
pretty concise, don`t ya think?
i don`t date people younger than me exclusively. as i said, i have had partners older than me, and the girl i`m seeing now is 5 years "my senior." haha.. but in all honesty, the age of a person matters to me about as much as their hair color. i can totally see how someone would become bored of
people in their own race, gender or age group once in awhile. for instance, lots of older women i`ve met are a lot more prudish than those younger than i am. they`re all like "i`m a woman now, i have to shop at holt & renfrew" and all they talk about is their jobs, instead of causing ruckus getting hammered. and since girls have been known to mature faster than boys, i`m sure a lot of them are yearning for some real conversation and real fun, instead of getting drunk and playing video games with boys their own age.
and let`s not forget sexual attraction... one of the most important things in a relationship, no matter how many people deny it. girls` hips and breasts develop at a younger age the more time passes, just like guys get taller. why do you think the tallest basketball player is now eight feet, compared to six-foot-something ten years ago? it`s evolution baby!
it may sound like i`m advocating pedophilia which i`m not. i think groups like NAMBLA are merely rationalizing their own fetishes, and not really considering anyone`s feelings but their own. i personally wouldn`t have sex with someone i suspected wasn`t emotionally "ready," no matter what their age. but who gets to decide when a kid is ready to have sex?
me?
you?
i wouldn`t fuck a 13-year-old, but at the same time i don`t see anything wrong with two 13-year-olds having sex with each other, if that`s what they really want.
i know a lot of 20-year-olds who are too stupid and irresponsible to have sex, but they still get to do it. and after all, i was sure as hell ready when i was 13.
i`m not pretending that i have some magical moral chart to deem what is and isn`t an acceptable age difference, but i don`t think anyone does.
there are, however, some people who disagree with me.
in Cieza, Spain, artist Violeta Gómez`s house was raided by police. they had obtained a warrant under their new western-inspired "Obscenity Law," and seized paintings, photographs and computer images of naked teenage girls, as well as all of her photography and computer equipment. despite the fact that none of her art work is at all pornographic, the police have still not returned any of the material taken in the raid. she has not been charged with anything.
of course i am against the making of child porn, just as i am against anyone of any age being forced to something they don`t want to do. but letting one group of people decide what`s child porn and what`s art is a recipe for disaster.
obscenity laws? age of consent laws?
trust me, if my 9th grade english teacher ever decided to statutorily rape me, in my young innocent boyhood, i would have happily CONSENTED to her right there on her desk if i didn`t CONSENT in my pants first!
since parents lived in a different time, i don`t think most of them understand how their children can be ready for action at a younger age than they were.
no one can tell someone when they`re ready to fuck. unless yer Catholic.
i bet if a jeweler fucked a florist, they`d give birth to a rapist.
i bet if you searched Rodger Lodge`s house, you`d find barrels of child porn.
your friend and confidante,
Liberace Jr.
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| ten ways to be "the funny guy" at work |
| 11.16.04 (12:35 pm) [edit] |
10. Keep telling the same person they have bad breath even if they don`t, and then punch them in the face.
9. Announce in a meeting that you have AIDS. After everyone gives you the sympathy remarks, tell everyone how you were just kidding and tell them that they are all a bunch of fucking queers.
8. Before a meeting, fill your mouth with custard. Then during the meeting, put one finger in the air and make a noise like you are hocking up a loogie. Then spit the custard into a glass and hand it to the person next to you and say, "Beat that."
7. Inform a male co-worker that he "wouldn`t make a good hooker." Then piss in his coffee and tell him that he needs a good ass fucking.
6. Always walk around with a big smile on your face and keep one hand down your pants.
5. Answer every question asked to you with "Fuck if I know" then call the person a racial slur that doesn`t correspond to their race.
4. Brag about the fact that you own a gun, and keep playing with your nuts. Get them all sweaty, and then walk around shaking everyone`s hands.
3. Shit on the floor in your office and when someone comes in and sees it, tell them it is the fake plastic kind. When they try to pick it up, and realize that their hand is covered in shit, laugh and point at them and call them a fucking asshole.
2. Run down the hall with your dick out while pissing all over and yell, "It won`t stop! Help me!" Then when it stops, look down and say "Oh."
1. Ask to borrow someone`s pen. Bring it into the bathroom and stick it in your ass. Take it back to the person you borrowed from and ask them to smell it. When they tell you that it smells bad, tell them, "It should. I had it in my ass."
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| remember when we used to hunt & gather? |
| 11.16.04 (12:35 pm) [edit] |
Kootenai River Project Report
By: Norm Grondin
August 13th we pulled into lynx`s place with our canoes in tow and bedded down for the night. During the next day we finished up some last minute projects and made our way to the beach for our campout/going away party and to get ready for our trip.
Although I was feeling a bit of apprehension over my and our preparedness for the trip my worries were quickly soothed by realising that we were all a little unprepared. We all had skills that others did not possess, as such we were able to share all of our collective knowledge.
From the beginning of our trip with a guy on a jetski coming up and mocking us on the beach with us in our buckskins there seemed to be a duality of us vs. them which unfortunately seeped into the trip more and more as time went on. As far as I was concerned there was a feeling of our lifestyle is better then yours among some of the members of our group. It made me a bit uncomfortable because how can one decide that there is one right way to live for everybody?
Anyway, the night before we started out we had a talking circle, which became a staple for the trip, so that we could each have our say about what we thought of the trip and so on, that was really a lot of fun. It came out I think, as a good way of introduction to everybody between both of our groups to get to know one another a little bit better.
The sun came over the mountain tops and shown off of the lake signalling our time to leave. We packed up, and over the course of the next several days we would be doing a lot of paddling; eating a lot of oregon grapes, kinickinick and rosehips as a supplement to our jerky and cattail roots in between. On the first day, myself feeling very worrisome about getting drips of water on my buckskins for fear of what might happen to them, fell into the water the first time getting out of our canoe. So, letting all apprehension go into the wind I stripped down naked and wrung them out with the help of Lily so that my clothes were just damp instead of dripping water like a sponge.
It was fairly warm over the first part of our trip as well, although we still did coalbeds for a few of the nights. For the latter part of the trip it was very rainy and overcast, with myself having a sore throat and chills after a few days, fear of hypothermia set in everytime it would rain. For the last few nights that I was on the trip I slept, or more laid, by the fire catching glimpses of sleep while trying to keep the fire built up enough to keep warm and avoid chills.
I did also develop a hole in my pants after a few days, I had to use a bone all to punch holes into my pants to get some sinew through to tie up the hole. I feel as though I would have been better off using a thong and lacing my clothes instead of sewing them because my stiching became loose after my clothes got wet. I think I will sometime go over my clothes and lace them for more of a secure feeling when I am in my buckskins.
On day 2 I went up on the other side of the hill to go to the bathroom and coming back I stopped and looked over the lake thinking about how we were eating only what we gathered, that we were wearing completely natural and homemade clothes I really felt connected to where we were and what we were doing. Upon my return to the group I even sat back a little ways and took on the role of voyeur to attempt to take in what it was we were all doing out here, realizing that we were not just on another camping trip.
Those feelings however waned quickly as I became more and more disillusioned by the feeling that we were on any normal camping trip only with less food and in buckskins. I felt more and more that we were surviving out there but we were not sustainable, that our primitive way of life would have to be short lived since we were using mostly food that we had brought for the bulk of our calories.
I, along with Tom, Donny and Felicia left the project after day 7 and for myself it was a very emotional and traumatic time. I was pretty sick, mainly it was the chills that I could not shake that were of concern to me but equally as disturbing to me was the emotional trauma that I was suffering at the hands of my dreams.
I really have felt for a long time that a gatherer/hunter way of life was the right one for me and largely for humanity as a whole in order to live sustainably, happy and free, however after being on the trip for a little while, along with other influences, I became very aware that that just was not the case. I was discovering more and more that my environment does not dictate my happiness or level of
freedom, that those are to be found in the heart, that we carry those things with us. For me to be unhappy out there on the trip was very hard because I had to come face to face with the realization that it was not just that easy as to move into the woods, moreover that living primitively is not a completely sustainable lifestyle. That life seems sustainable only because of the low population on the earth at that time, so that anything was sustainable because there was so much land.
Regardless of my emotional stress, which was in fact a blessing for personal growth and increased happiness in the end I feel as though the trip became tainted by my stress and I found it more and more difficult to take anything positive from the trip through that mask of disillusionment. I think it was beneficial for me to leave for that reason as much as for my illness. I later found out that it became colder and rained for pretty much the rest of the time out there, which would have made it hard to keep warm.
In the end I am so grateful at having the opportunity to participate on this project and I have learned so much, not only about primitive skills but also about myself. I feel as though it is important to do trips like this, to remind ourselves about this life that our ancestors once lived and to be able to incorporate aspects of it into our everyday lives into areas where we may have taken a wrong turn. This trip has and does mean a lot to me and I doubt it will be the last one of its kind that I participate in, I will set out in the future with a clearer mind as to what I want and the kind of experience that I choose. This experience may be over but the learning from it has yet to stop, for that and for everything else I am grateful.
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| aural epicac |
| 10.16.04 (1:15 am) [edit] |
well it seems that Shania Twain and Mark McGrath (of Sugar Ray uhh "fame") have a new song called "Party For Two"
this song..
one sec..
BLAAAARGGGGGG
ughhh... sorry, as i was saying the song is called Party For..
h-hold on...
BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRG
ahhh.... ahh shit... jesus christ
i just wanted to say that Shania and Mark`s new song is..
one second..
RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAUUUUUULLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL LFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF
BLAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAARG
i`m sorry. i was gonna write an entry but i just can`t stop puking for some reason!
maybe it was something i HEARD!
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| gigantic, gigantic, gigantic, a big big love |
| 10.16.04 (1:15 am) [edit] |
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if there is one person that you can`t stop thinking about....post this same exact sentence in your journal...
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| mewl? |
| 10.16.04 (1:14 am) [edit] |
hello everyone.
it's me, Gravy. i am Mike's cat. he's away from the computer right now, probably out getting me food (cuz he's totally my bitch), so i thought i would take this time to share some breaking news with you all.
Ontario has just become the first province in Canada to ban an entire breed of dog, that breed being the pit bull terrier.
the government assured everyone not to worry, because "current pit bull owners will still be able to keep their pets."
oh, swell! you mean they're not going to travel through the province, going door-to-door and euthanizing everyone's dogs? gee, THANKS! that's really humane of the Ontario government, don't you think?
one may suspect that i wouldn't be too upset over a province-wide ban on one of my enemies. it's true, i hate all dogs. they make my tail all bushy, and i hiss at them like this: "sssssssssssss!" i also arch my back, to make myself appear bigger than my usual five-pound frame, so that whatever dog bold enough to step up to The Gravy, cowers and runs away from me, terrified and defeated.
as much as i hate all canines (and other cats, and birds and squirrels, and loud noises, and people i don't know), i think that this new law is quite ridiculous. there are irresponsible and abusive dog owners everywhere. vicious attacks are not limited to one specific breed. dalmatians, rottweilers and german shepherds are also known to be aggressive. are we going to ban those breeds next?
if parents abuse their children, it's likely they will grow up to be violent and hostile towards others. it's the same thing with pets. if our province really wanted to protect the people against dog attacks, they would provide us with more information on how to understand and judge animals' behavior. people don't know enough about dogs, and therefore can't recognize when they're pissed off enough to attack a human being.
i am an adorable half-siamese kittycat, and we have a bad reputation too! we're apparently very territorial and aggressive. i hear mike telling his friends i'm half-mental and that's why i scratch and bite people. he thinks i don't understand english, but i do! and i scratch and bite people cuz i like to, not because of my inbred ancestry.
i think mike and all of you other humans should stick to getting me food, and cleaning up my shit. i'll take care of all the laws relating to pet ownership.
and furthermore...
meow, meow, meow
meow meow meow, meow meow
yours aloofly,
Gravy
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| british columbia`s million dollar grow shows |
| 10.16.04 (1:13 am) [edit] |
i`ve said it before and i will say it again...
i love weed from BC
and this year, they have managed to turn out some of the bombest shit ever and SO MUCH OF IT! there have been hardly any dry spells all year, and this "jamaican" strain or whatever they`re calling it... kicks ass.
people started to say that this year was gonna be really iffy for pot-growing cuz the canadian hydro companies are starting to work with the cops who are "cracking down" on grow ops or whatever.
when will everyone learn that the more weed cops "destroy," the more people will plant?
the following is a story from the inside of a huge grow operation in Vancouver, BC. the following is written by my good friend... Pete Brady:
"When they took the blindfold off me, I was in the driveway of a 2,000 square foot house in an upscale suburban community near Vancouver, Canada, escorted by a man called "BC Hardcore."
He and I had been introduced to each other by Mike Straumietis, co-founder of the Canadian marijuana plantfood company Advanced Nutrients, after I`d told Mike I wanted to do an article about large-scale commercial production of marijuana.
The house was nine years old, and had been bought two months ago for $300,000 by people intending to use the entire house for growing pot.
In the high-stakes world of commercial growing, smart people like BC Hardcore are professionally paranoid. The people who purchased the house and pay property taxes on it are not BC Hardcore or his associates – they are a shadowy investment group with fictitious identities, complex real estate paperwork, dummy investors, puppet people, and foreign bank accounts.
If the grow house is ever busted, it won`t matter how hard investigators work to find its real owners. It won`t matter if everybody found at the grow house narked as much as they knew – the real owners of the house, and the people who helped them obtain ownership of it, will never be identified, and, even if identified, will probably never be caught, punished, or have their assets seized.
Canadian police know this, and they don`t try so hard to bust big grows, which is one reason that growing in Canada is still much safer than growing in the US.
Green gold
The British Columbia (BC) marijuana growing industry generates about $6 billion per year in hard currency profits; this allows people like BC Hardcore and those above him to amass personal fortunes and political power.
Everyone gets a piece of the marijuana cultivation money-pie – hardware stores, car dealerships, electricians, real estate agents, police officers, money launderers, attorneys, bankers, and retail stores.
Some police officers grow, sell, and smoke pot. Prosecutors and judges do too. Technicians who work for BC Hydro, the main electricity supplier, often help growers get enough electricity in ways that won`t be detected by BC Hydro`s partnership with anti-marijuana police, who seek to identify grow ops based on unusually high energy consumption.
And at the top of the food chain, people take a million a year in profit, without running the risk of getting busted or doing the hard work of keeping crops alive. The industry doesn`t run on trust, good intentions or so-called "marijuana consciousness." It runs on one mutual interest: to make as much money as possible, as soon as possible, with as little risk as possible.
That`s why the BC commercial bud industry relies heavily on growing and shipping the same type of bud, and on emphasizing yield over diversity. That`s why the BC commercial industry has a "flavor of the moment" approach to crop selection. A few years ago, almost every commercial grower was growing Big Bud. Then, consumers got tired of Big Bud, so growers switched to Hashplant.
The current fave flavor is the so-called "Jamaican," which really isn`t Jamaican at all. It`s just a variety, like all the other varieties that commercial producers have favored over the years. It clones well, yields high, finishes early, cures fast, looks good to Americans (the primary customers for BC bud), and ships well.
Down in the states, consumers are starting to grumble about the predictability of "BC Hydro Jamaican," saying that they are becoming immune to the high and bored with the flavor. Pretty soon, "Jamaican" will no longer be what`s grown in 90% of BC`s big rooms. It will be replaced by some other easy-to-grow, lime green, "not too many red hairs" variety, which will thrive in clone heaven for a couple of years until US consumers again demand a new strain.
No trail
BC Hardcore doesn`t know who pays his salary or who gives him the average $50,000 per month that he uses for payroll, supplies, pay-offs, and other operating expenses. His funding arrives through untraceable methods. Communications are conducted via secure channels; the people he talks to from time to time, the people "in charge," use devices that mask their voices and location.
As Hardcore greeted his grow house construction crew, I surveyed various activities taking place, as well as the general appearance and surroundings of the house.
Grow houses exist in all kinds of neighborhoods and configurations, but BC houses aim for ideals, and ideals are what I am going to emphasize in this article and its sequel. In this regard, ideal cultivation houses usually sit on at least a half-acre of land, and are surrounded by trees, hedges, fences or other physical barriers that prevent visual surveillance by people off the property.
The houses are protected by gated driveways, and by remote sensors, electronic trip-wires, surveillance cameras and listening devices.
On the commercial grow house tour BC Hardcore took me on, we visited one house that did not have this vast array of sophisticated monitoring devices. The house was out in the country; the long lane leading up to it was blocked by a reinforced steel gate, and a grow caretaker lived in a smaller house, about 50 yards from the grow house.
When we walked up to the front door of the house, we noticed a broken window and torn-up mini-blind inside the window frame. The front door had been kicked in and then re-attached. The front hallway monitoring camera had been yanked off its wall mount and was in pieces on the floor. The flowering room`s 500 plants had been harvested a week ago; the would-be thieves, whom BC Hardcore believed were insiders recently fired for sloppy manicuring work on an earlier harvest, had guessed wrong about harvest time and arrived too late to steal fresh buds, so they had trashed the interior of the house and fled.
The caretaker never woke during the night-time burglary; he showed up when Hardcore and I were in the house, trying too hard to apologize for being a useless human guard dog. He was fired two weeks later, after Hardcore had transferred all plants and equipment out of the house, transferred ownership of the house to a real estate sales consortium, and transformed the interior and infrastructure so nobody would ever know that the house had been used for a massive marijuana operation.
Home improvement
At one house Hardcore and I visited, feverish activity was transforming the structure into an industrial agricultural facility.
A squad of interior re-designers was inside, knocking down walls or building new ones. They were creating a series of 400 square foot rooms that would be lit by 10 to 20 1,000-watt Agrosun and Hortilux bulbs per room. They were building plywood shelves that would hold a growing medium called Sunshine Mix #4, which consists of quality soil, sphagnum moss and perlite. They were installing drains, reservoirs, pumps and other water systems to ensure that plants had water and that their growing trays could drain properly.
They were fiberglassing trays and other surfaces to prevent water damage. They were covering walls with shiny white polythene plastic, taping room corners, cutting holes in the plastic at designated locations to facilitate wiring, ducts, pipes, and other infrastructure, installing fixtures and wires, and then sealing the cuts.
They were ripping out electrical systems and putting better ones in, installing security systems, and putting lights, bulbs, dehumidifiers, odor control devices, CO2 generators, reflectors, and ballasts where they were supposed to be.
To put it as simply as possible, the exterior of the house would now be a facade, a hollow shell that provided cover for the house`s new function as home for plants, not people.
Electricity
BC Hardcore believes that fresh 1,000-watt bulbs are capable of providing adequate lighting for 15 to 20 plants per light in a 16 to 20 square foot area per light. He says that after three crop cycles, the bulbs should always be replaced.
He prefers to use a ratio of three Hortilux (HPS) lights for every Agrosun (Metal Halide) light; he says that when the reddish spectrum of HPS lights dominates the color temperature of a grow room, the plants will be shorter, denser, and will finish earlier.
While the rooms are being fabricated or upgraded, electricians are also re-wiring. They visually and electronically inspect every circuit and wire in the house, and usually are forced to install new circuit boxes and wires because electrical systems deteriorate over time, especially in wet climates or where there are rodent infestations, and because regular electrical systems cannot handle the wattage necessary for a commercial grow.
The typical circuit in your living-room, for example, can process about 15 amps of power. Other circuits in your house which supply heavy-duty appliances such as ovens and washing machines can process 30 to 50 amps of power.
Lights used to grow marijuana suck down a lot of power. Most commercial growers use 1,000-watt lights because such lights provide adequate penetration and illumination, especially in situations when clones are used in the densely-packed "sea of green" method. A 1,000-watt light consumes about nine amps of power. BC Hardcore`s electricians told me it isn`t safe to load a circuit at higher than 80% of its rated amp output. Thus, one 1,000-watt light is about all a typical 15 amp circuit can safely feed.
Lights aren`t the only electricity hogs in a grow house. Air conditioning units, fans, dehumidifiers, pumps, and security equipment also require many watts of power, so electricians must outfit commercial grow houses with circuitry that can handle loads that total thousands of amps.
Hardcore says that a simple way to calculate electricity needs is to allow 1,600 watts of power consumption for each 1,000-watt light. This consumption rate total includes all the other electrical devices – air conditioning, fans, dehumidifiers, etc. – needed to support the grow system.
Most of the commercial grow houses built by Hardcore run 50 to 100 lights. As much as 80,000 watts of power is needed during the daylight cycle of a typical commercial grow room. To decrease power consumption and balance the load of electricity demand, many commercial growers use "flip-flop" devices that switch electrical loads between different grow rooms. In a flip-flop system, ballasts are on 24 hours a day, but the flip-flop unit switches the ballasts` power output to lights in various rooms as needed, so that only 50% of the lights are on at any one time.
Power narcs
After total electrical load has been determined and adequate circuit boards, wiring and other equipment have been put in place, Hardcore has to figure out how to get enough juice to the system. Buying power from the provincial public utility, BC Hydro, is out of the question, because BC Hydro (along with most other power companies) is an active partner in the drug war.
Power companies have sophisticated computerized monitoring programs that identify grow operations, not just based on unusually high consumption but also based on patterns of consumption. The initial telltale spike in power consumption that occurs at the beginning of a light cycle in a multi-light commercial room can be "seen" by electricity company monitors. The utility`s spy software can also recognize the steady consumption of electricity that feeds lights in the 18-hour or 12-hour cycles used by growers during vegetative or floral growth phases.
Hardcore and other commercial growers defeat BC Hydro by stealing power. Hardcore claims that about 50% of BC Hydro`s former and current workers are helping marijuana growers steal power, or are operating grow houses themselves, using 100% pirated electricity.
Power companies usually employ hundreds of energy-theft inspectors who look at power lines and examine power meters from the street, and in people`s yards.
In rural locations, or when houses have basements or other secure spaces that can be insulated, soundproofed, and vented, commercial growers install power generators that use propane, natural gas, or diesel fuel.
A generator that can supply enough power to support a 50-light grow room has to put out about 80 kilowatts of power; a quality used generator with this capacity costs about $25,000. Generators generate ongoing costs, logistical concerns, and safety concerns due to fuel purchases, fuel transport, generator noise, and fire danger.
Hardcore says growers who intend to use a generator should buy one that shuts down if there is low fuel oil or if the "hertz cycle" or voltage is too high or low. He recommends outfitting the device with a noise-dampening muffler. The best type of generator engine, according to Hardcore, is an overhead valve engine with cast iron sleeves in the cylinders.
Payday
The payoff for commercial growers is huge. BC Hardcore diagrammed the agricultural economics of big grows as follows: It costs about $120,000 CDN to initially outfit a house to make it a commercial grow. This does not include the purchase cost of an average 2,000 square foot house, which can hold a 75-light operation growing 1,100 plants that produce 150 pounds of top-grade sinsemilla every eight weeks.
Ongoing costs after start up are about $11,000 per month. The cost of a mortgage is on average $15,000 down, and $1,000 a month in mortgage and property taxes for the kind of house that growers prefer. Thus, the first year cost of running a 75-light commercial grow is approximately $277,000. Costs decrease after the first year.
With proper quality control and nutrients that produce at least two pounds per light, a 75-light grower can harvest about 900 pounds of cannabis per year. Cannabis sells for an average of $2,300 CDN wholesale, which results in gross sales of about $2 million per year.
Even if we upped the per year expenses to $350,000 per year, the profit on a 75-light, 2,000 square foot grow house is $1.65 million per year. If the grow consortium wanted to pay cash for the house ($300,000), profits would still total more than a million dollars per year, right from the start."
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| RIP: the reason stem cell research was momentarily important |
| 10.16.04 (1:13 am) [edit] |
christopher reeve, get back on that horse!
or at least freeze yourself cryogenically, so they can thaw you out after they`ve used all the non-famous people on earth as guinea pigs to find a cure for your celebrity affliction.
my mom is friends with a flaky woman named leslie. my mom talks a lot, and one day she was going on about leslie`s family and how fucked they are. at first i thought she was just telling a "listen-how-fucked-up-the -neigbors-are-glad-
its-not-us" story, but i grew more and more concerned.. bothered.. maybe disgusted is the right word.. as she went on.
leslie is married to a controlling guy, i forget his name, but he is apparently a big asshole. he picks fights with leslie`s friends and prevents her from working or doing anything outside the home without him. he makes minimum wage and sues insurance companies to try and get rich. now no one will insure their house and they have to move. and yes, as you may have guessed, these two selfish idiots did in fact get together and make two children that they now have to "take care" of. whatever.
they have a son, jeff. he is 18, and always in some sort of trouble. i`ve got no problem with people stealing, but this is one of those stupid thugs who always gets CAUGHT thereby putting his family through lots of unnecessary bullshit. leslie and her stupid husband paid a thousand dollars to bail him out last time, and the cops put him under house arrest. the son, mother and father regularly get into physical confrontations and shouting matches. cops come to their house a lot for domestic disturbance calls.
in the middle of this backwoods trailer-trash hell is their 15-year-old daughter, jennifer. she goes to school, likes playing computer games, and she loves animals. she also has multiple sclerosis.
as if this poor girl`s situation wasn`t shitty enough, her parents are actually self-absorbed and cruel enough to use their daughter`s disability in an attempt to bilk money out of insurance companies. they wrote a letter about her to one of their lawyers, and talked about jennifer`s condition. they also let her read it. the letter stated that because of their daughter`s disease, she will never have a full-time job, and never be able to take care of herself. after reading it, jennifer said "i was sad when i read the part about me, mom. why do i have to have this disease? why me?"
as my own mother told me this fucked up story, she wondered aloud why god would give a girl a terrible disease like that, and have her raised in such an unsupportive, dysfunctional family. no offense to my mom, but it`s situations like these that remind me of the fact that there is no god.
i hear this woman talk to my mom. she talks about every little fucking problem she has, and never EVER mentions her daughter. my mom found a bunch of information on her disease on the internet, including ways to improve the symptoms and side effects of medication. leslie asked her how she "knows all of this stuff"! her daughter has fucking MS and she doesn`t research it on the internet!!! she is too preoccupied with her own stupid, petty problems to give a shit about her terminally ill child.
jennifer goes to public school and all the kids make fun of her. her medication makes her eyes droopy and the disease itself impedes her speech at times, so sometimes it`s hard to understand what she says. the more my mom told me about jennifer, the more i wanted to meet her. i want this girl`s phone number, email, address, whatever. i want to make sure she knows what it feels like to spend time with someone who wants to know her. to have a real friend, at least once in her life.
my mom says she is a really smart girl with an awesome sense of humor, and that she is really into animals. i told her to invite her and her mom over sometime, and maybe me and jennifer could take gravy (my sassy yet aloof cat) for a walk.
it`s really lame, but it`s like all i can think of to do for her. and maybe it will make her happy for a little while, but even if it does, she is still hopelessly stuck with these incompetent parents in this bullshit life she totally doesn`t deserve.
but hey everybody...
POOR CHRISTOPHER REEVE
he was famous, remember? poor stupid bastard.
and a well-respected crusader for stem-cell research... after he fell off the horse that is.
before that happened, he couldn`t give a flying fuck.
just becuz yer handicapped doesn`t mean yer not a selfish prick.
stephen hawking writes about black holes. but christopher reeve... he studied his own handicap. tried to fix himself. made movies about other people who had the exact same problems as him. what a hero!
i can hear everyone yelling at me already, and to answer your yells... yes, if i was paralyzed, i would want to be fixed. i would want to walk and dance and fuck again, but ya know what? i would still care about other stuff. like technology run afuckingmuck!
is there anyone out there who can seriously give me one concrete reason why stem cell research is a good idea? why, cuz it can lead to new medical breakthroughs?
there have been diseases since the beginning of time, and what`s the last thing we`ve developped a vaccine for, polio? come on. we all know what all this gene therapy research bullshit is really going to be used for in the end... they`ll clone a donkey and make it have sex with a llama and feed the offspring to a goat to see what happens.
but okay, let`s pretend that stem cell research cures all of humankind`s illnesses. is THAT a good idea?
think about it... is it?
we`re already overpopulated as fuck, every single person doing major damage to the planet we inhabit. even if we are as eco-concious as possible, our mere EXISTENCE fucks up the earth. so how is it a good idea to keep humans alive for as long as "humanly" possible?
a lot of the cold remedies, makeup, candles and moisturizers sold in stores are tested on animals. and to clarify, "tested" doesn`t mean the animals were put in a room and shown flash cards. they die so that we can feel better. does anyone out there think that makes sense? i`m not asking if you think it`s "right or wrong," i would just like to understand how it makes logical sense. is it proven scientifically somewhere that human beings matter more than any other living creature on earth?
how many of our medical advancements in the western world are thanks to the SS Doctors of the holocaust? we have torturous medical experiments on jews to thank for most of our vaccines. victims in concentration camps were put into pressure chambers, tested with drugs, castrated, frozen to death. children were exposed to experimental surgeries performed without anesthesia, transfusions of blood from one to another, isolation endurance. the doctors made injections with lethal germs, sex change operations, removal of organs and limbs. a big reason we have eye contacts today is because of Josef Mengele, a holocaust doctor who injected chemicals into the eyes of jewish children, to see if he could change their eye color. they used jews to test vaccines for typhus and malaria, which means they were purposely infected with these diseases. we learned how to treat burns, hypothermia, and poisoning, all from painful experiments conducted by SS Doctors, as well as how to distill sea water (they made jews drink water with random chemicals added, to see if the concoctions were poisonous or not).
i sometimes wonder how many people would be willing to live a healthy life if they knew where all of our medicine came from. i`d rather endure another smallpox epidemic than have to live with where we got the vaccine. fortunately, the vaccine didn`t even work in the fuckin first place so BRING ON THE SMALLPOX!
i`m not trying to tell anyone what`s right or wrong, here. kill animals, don`t kill animals. experiment on jews, don`t experiment on jews. whatever.
christopher reeve never asked these questions, though. he never gave a moment`s thought to whether any of this catastrophic bullshit was good for the rest of the billions of people he shared the earth with.
it was good for christopher reeve.
i can`t help but wonder why he didn`t just fly into the center of the earth and push it so it rotates backwards, thereby turning time back to before he was paralyzed?
ya i know...
SO going to hell
luv,
clark kunt
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| how to get any job |
| 10.09.04 (3:03 am) [edit] |
i just got a new job working at a halfway house for convicted criminals. i`ve only had three shifts so far, so i am the new guy, but as far as i know the place is a "community of love and hope" (that`s what it says on the sign) that serves as a rest stop for ex-cons, to help them get their shit together and re-enter our wonderful capitalist society. it`s weird. i have to do rounds and check all of their rooms for drugs. so far i haven`t found any... :) <-frownyface>
i also teach guitar lessons at a music studio in the same city, and do volunteer work for the toronto chapter of Greenpeace. the rest of my time is spent spray-painting pictures of pee-pees and wee-wees on the walls of the various banks and bus stations around my area.
forced labour sucks, but i am in huge debt right now and i also want to move out of the country someday, so i figure i might as well make the best of it. i hate getting up early and having to wear a watch, but i feel much better working to help and educate people, instead of making coffee for people to lazy to do it themselves, taking calls from customers making sure their money is okay, or processing order forms for a rivets manufacturer.
so maybe right now you are wondering how a freak like me could possibly get a job outside of a factory or warehouse. i don`t dress up for interviews. not because i`m trying to make a statement or anything, i just don`t own any "nice dress pants" as my mom would call them, and i`m NOT about to go out and buy any that`s for fuckin sure, unless my employer wants to give me the money. i usually just wear a button-up shirt and whatever pants i have without holes in them. and as for tucking shirts in my pants? ummmmmmm yah, i don`t "DO" tucking, sorry. i also don`t take out or hide the barbell in my tongue. if the interviewer is anal-retentive enough not to hire me because of a piece of jewelry in my mouth, then i don`t want to work for them anyway.
dress is something to consider when you go for a job interview. if u wanna be hardcore and dress how u want, do it. dressing better might get you some kissass points, but a lot of supervisors don`t like having their asses kissed, and might respect you more for being yourself. remember this when you are asked questions in your interview.
if you want to get a job, you first need a resume. don`t pay anyone to make one for you, they are ridiculously easy. here is an example of a resume. feel free to copy it if you like:
"Dick Nasty
742 Evergreen Terrace
Beverly Hills, CA
90210
(555)555-5555
email: myemailaddressrocks@hotma il.com
OBJECTIVE
I am currently looking for a full-time position to broaden my work experience. I am a recent graduate of The School of Hard Knocks, and I am fully cunnilingual, I mean bilingual.
WORK EXPERIENCE
Male stripper at The Foxxes Den
From January 2001 to August 2003
Duties: Stir drinks, attend to customers, "shake my moneymaker," twirl toy guns playfully and lasso horny housewives.
Contact: Little Debbie (555)555-5555
EDUCATION
me no gots none
OTHER RELATED SKILLS
cunnilinguistics
HOBBIES
reading
writing
rockin out
being awesome
(References available upon request)"
search for jobs in local papers, or on job-search websites on the internet such as monster or workopolis.
now just email your resume to the employers you want, with a note like this:
"Hi my name is Bruno and I am responding to your ad for the male stripping position. I have attached my resume in MS-Word format (or watever) for you to view at your convenience."
you can also fax resumes to employers, along with a cover letter (any word processing program should have templates for these).
some companies and organizations are so hoity-toity, they ask you to apply in person. i generally don`t go for these jobs, cuz most often it`s a waste of time. or it could be a bullshit job like cold-calling or door-to-door canvassing, or worse... COMMISSION!
if you email a resume to an employer, they will most likely give you a phone call. here`s what you do when they call you... ask them questions over the phone, like "what are the hours?" and "what exactly does this job entail." wait until the interview to ask how much it pays.
so now it`s interview day. take a shower (optional), then brush yer teeth (optional). then get dressed in whatever you want, we already went over this. so now you`re waiting for the interviewer, a few things to remember. 1) don`t be nervous, it`s just a stupid job, and 2) try not to flirt with any of your soon-to-be coworkers cuz for all you know it is the interviewer`s husband or wife, and there goes yer job, right? right.
so now the interviewer walks out and says "Hi Cassidy!" (or whatever your name is).
stand up and shake his or her hand (or give props with a tightly closed fist) and say "nice to meet you" or something equally gay. follow the interviewer to a room and prepare for bullshit.
interviewers will usually skim your resume as they talk to you, so be ready for questions relating to your previous jobs, like "Taco Bell, huh? so what exactly did you do there?"
they might also ask you what you like BEST about working at one of your previous jobs. in this case, just say "The people! The people were great, very friendly and I got along with them well!" see how the game works? now if the interviewer asks:
"What do you think are your best and worst qualities?"
..first, resist the urge to hook him or her in the face, then just bullshit something. a good answer would be.. ahem.. "Well, you see I am a perfectionist so I take a lot of pride in my work, and that is my best quality. Of course, perfectionism can easily lead to worrying too much about the task at hand, so I guess you could say it is my worst quality as well."
isn`t this the worst? interviews are terribly fake and phony, but it is basically a test of your social skills. the interviewer throws bullshit at you, and then sees if you can adequately bullshit back. kind of like school! so only use these bullshit answers if you can`t think of anything else to say. don`t be afraid to joke around, either. in many cases, the person interviewing you has been talking to five hundred other boring interviewees all day, and would appreciate some real human interaction.
if the interviewer asks you where you see yourself in five years from now, don`t say "doing your wife!" instead say something like:
"i hope to someday own my own greeting card business"
keep it short, but meaningful. tell the truth for this one if you want to (unless you are an aspiring porn director... in that case, go with the greeting card thing).
if the person interviewing you is a REAL dickwad, they may even throw a question like this at you:
"This job involves relying a lot on your own judgement. Can you give me an example of a time where you used your own judgement to effectively solve a work-related problem?"
in this case... LIE! make something up off the top of your head, as long as it makes you sound good! pick one of your jobs, and say "Oh well one time when I was working at (INSERT JOB HERE), a customer complained about..." nanananna you get the drift, right?
jobs are stupid.
only work as hard as they pay you.
use all of their expensive equipment to your advantage.
don`t respect your co-workers if they don`t respect you.
you own money, it doesn`t own you.
so when you`ve had enough... quit
a job is the only thing in the world that actually feels GOOD to give up...
make sure you try it at least once
luv,
jack`s smirking revenge
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| constructive criticism |
| 10.09.04 (2:07 am) [edit] |
lotsa people write me messages about my journal. i appreciate all the nice things you guys and gyals have sent, but i just can`t resist printing the ones from people who hate me. below is an actual message i received from someone regarding the organized response by myself and others to a nazi rally held in toronto a few months ago:
"know what’s funny, you calling someone a hypocrit. you preach tolerance in one entry, so we should have free speech so you can say whatever you want, but as soon as the Neo-Nazi party shows up in Toronto, you show up and ruin their rally? buddy, you are as hypocritical as they come so I don’t see how you get off your high horse and FUCK OFF!"
okay, first of all i’ll just start my reply to this letter by letting you all know that had i left the spelling errors intact, this person’s argument would seem a lot less credible.
i don’t feel bad when people call me a hypocrite. because the only way to be completely non-hypocritical (or is it un-?) is to not believe in ANYTHING one way or the other. you would have to ride the fence on every issue to be completely free of any hypocrisy, and if you have successfully done this for your entire life up to this point.. well... good job! even tho i think it’s impossible to escape hypocrisy, i will try my best to defend my position.
yes, i hate closed-minded people, and yes i consider myself to be open-minded. i believe in free speech, which is why i would have no problem printing any sort of rebuttal from a racist. if a nazi wrote an essay called “Why All Jews Should Die Like Dogs,” and asked me to print it in my journal, i would.
i think what you are forgetting about the “free speech” idea, is that i don’t have to wait my turn to talk... and what’s more... i don’t want to.
so when a group of people set up shop in MY city, and start using citizens’ frustrations with their jobs and their kids’ low test scores, and try to pin it on a specific RACE? fuck ya, i’ve got something to say back! and i’ll say it at the same time as the nazis if i have to! i’m finished skool, “buddy” so i don’t raise my hand to speak.
my problem with nazis isn’t what they say. they can say “lynch the niggers” til they’re blue in the face. i don’t care and i’m sure most black people in toronto don’t either. but nazis aren’t marching through the streets becuz they want to “talk” the other races out of the city. they don’t carry huge placards of Hitler becuz they like what he “said.” the neo-nazis have an agenda, and they are pretty open and straightforward about it, i might add. their agenda constitutes violence against citizens of this multi-cultural city, who i consider to be MY people, and it is the nazis` proposed actions i am responding to, not their words.
a lot of people might say we are stepping on the rights of the neo-nazis by staging demos whenever they do. well here’s the thing about me... i don’t give two shits about “rights.” or even one shit, actually. i give ZERO shits about all these personal protection laws. why? cuz they’re bullshit just like all laws! we can draft all the hate crime legislation we want, but it does absolutely nothing for us.
this message reminds me of an argument i got in with someone on here who shall remain nameless. it seems she was training to be a cop and i asked her if she would arrest her cancerous mother if she found weed on her. she said she would because the law says weed is wrong, and we have laws for a reason. when i told her that laws change all the time, she became defensive and let me know that if we didn`t have laws, then there would be complete chaos. funny... i thought that was happening already. people murder and rape whoever they want, regardless of any law that tells them not to. i don`t murder or rape people, but i smoke weed all the time so i guess these laws don’t work very well, do they? abortion used to be legal and it didn’t stop girls from doing it. murder is currently illegal (last time i checked) but people get murdered all the time. cocaine is illegal but i just did some last week, and i will continue to do it any time i feel like and there is not a law in the world that will ever stop me. laws don’t stop drugs from growing, just like they didn’t stop gandhi from making salt. and it’s the same thing with “rights.”
we all have “rights,” but what are they really? most people would maintain that *I* don’t have the right to punch you (the reader) in the face. and if i did, i would get arrested and charged with assault. unless i ran away after and the cops couldn’t find me. in which case, i just flagrantly trampled all over your rights, and the law did not do anything to stop me.
there’s also the matter of people’s individual idea of morality. if i asked a bunch of people if murder is “good” or “right,” they would all say “no.” but if i asked them if it’s “justified” to kill the man who raped and murdered one of their family members, almost everyone would say “yes," because "he started it!"
many people consider killing animals for clothing to be “morally wrong” (whatever that means) but i wonder how those people would feel about the “murderers” who live in extremely cold climates, and would die if they didn’t take the fur of other animals.
what i’m trying to get across to you, dear message writer, is that there is no such thing as good and evil. our morals are our own creations, born from our own hearts, and i am proud to claim mine as my own. nazis want genocide. if you don’t know that, you are an idiot cuz it is pretty much the main part of their agenda. me and my friends don’t think you should die because of the color of your skin, which is why we attend their rallies and subsequently fuck their shit up.
someone once asked:
“At the risk of sounding contrarian (I hate fascists just as much as the next person), how does a small counter-demo demonstrate this? Doesn`t it just give them more publicity? Wouldn`t ignoring them send (in this case) send out a stronger message?”
no offense intended to the person who wrote the above stuff, but i think yer missing the simplicity of a demo, or counter-demo in this case. and what’s more, I think people tend to analyze the confrontation of a group they oppose to rationalize their own fear of participating. sorry to be so brutally honest, but it’s either that, or you think it’s okay for bigots to try and gain control over a city so that they can impose their own rules as to “which race is right!”
some people are so open-minded they wouldn’t take their own side in an argument.
if someone broke into your house and said they were going to kill your family, would you sit there and wonder if your anger is “validated,” or if you should infringe on their “right to kill?” or would you get up and kick their ass?
it really is as simple as that.
ignoring bullies in skool doesn’t work and ignoring nazis didn’t work in the thirties, now did it?
so behold my hypocrisy, young’uns! i love gandhi but would not hesitate in kicking his ass if he annoyed me. and that goes for you too!
thanks for writing.
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